It appears as if the days of the stereotype sung by Carol Channing in the Broadway production of “Gentlemen Prefer Blondes”, might be over with.
With the advent of several birthdays, anniversaries, and the soon approaching Christmas holiday, I find myself in a rather odd position. The stereotype in what women want as gifts doesn’t seem to be the case anymore at all. The things in which we (as men) grew up to learn about what women wanted has been thrown out the window entirely.
It used to be a safe bet for a man to buy a woman either chocolate, flowers, or jewelry, or all of them. But I am finding out that within the group of female colleagues and friends that its not really what they want any more.
Sure, I don’t see a woman turning down these things. I don’t see how a woman would want to turn away from FREE chocolate. But it really isn’t what they WANT from anyone. It appears that the female population (at least within my circles) want things that are less tangible and more meaningful. They seem to want to hang on to the bond of friendship more often than not. That they want that to grow and develop, rather than a bouquet of flowers or a box of chocolates.
I will say that some of my female friends are already married. So perhaps if it is chocolate and flowers and jewelry that they want, they could probably seek it from their husbands. But, not all of my female friends are married or in a relationship. And they still would rather pass on the objects and maintain the emotional bonds.
I have a friend’s birthday that is coming up and I have absolutely no clue at all what she would like or would want. Perhaps the first step would be to ask. Yet with previous conversations I have had, she’s not exactly the “material girl” either.
That is not to say that ALL women have abandoned the stereotype and aim for less tangible things in which they desire. There are still those who want these things. I am just saying that through my social life, those women that I speak to regularly are NOT those kinds of women.
I personally have no problem giving my female friends chocolates or roses. I am not opposed to ordering a small and simple vase of flowers for their special day. Whether they are married or not. My intentions are always true… “This is for your special day. Be happy!”.
I recall one time that I sent a half dozen roses that were white, to a female friend of mine who was married. It was for her wedding anniversary. She was thrilled. But when she got home, the gift in which her own husband had purchased for her, she found less endearing than the white roses. Oops!!
They do laugh about it now.
Clearly, it was not the objective to outshine her own spouse. That’s just what happened. I’m also not opposed to “downgrading” a gift, just in case that may happen again.
One thing that I always run into over and over and over again is “Don’t spend your money!”. Well, I am creative. I can create greeting cards, write poetry, give simple gifts in lieu of roses, chocolate, and jewelry and it would be tons cheaper if not at any cost at all. But what exactly is it that women want any more??
Perhaps it all depends on who the woman is. And that would make sense to me. If I was friends with a woman, and I knew she loved Chinese food. I’d probably buy her a gift certificate for the nearest Chinese restaurant. I think that it’s really, all a matter of paying attention.
If she’s been raving about a particular film that is about to come out, then I’d get her free movie passes.
Each woman is individually unique. That goes for anyone in this world. And I love all of my friends, male or female, in my own unique way.
It is just- what in the world do women want??
Dambreaker 