A Very Memorable First Impression

Posted: January 20, 2012 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , , ,

“What did the five fingers say to the face?”~ Dave Chappelle

Yesterday I received a call from someone that I knew so long ago. After about an hour of talking and catching up with one another, she had invited me to return to Kansas to be there to celebrate the renewing of her wedding vows to her husband.

I actually was there when she got married during a small civil ceremony. I was the one that actually walked the bride outside onto the deck where it all took place. Such an honor.

But now they are going to renew their vows this March and of course she knew that I lived so far away, and yet still felt it was important for her to invite me anyway. As they say, it was the thought that counts.

After a while, I called my friends in Kansas to talk about the fact that she had called to invite me. And then the conversation had turned to taking a few moments to remember some memories that my friends and I had. Particularly the day that I met my friend’s wife for the first time. We all agreed that this story is funny, and that I should share it on my blog.

I had been friends with Jeremy for a few years and he kept talking about this woman whom he had dated a while back. They lost touch with one another and he began to wonder about her. But then when Jeremy’s sister was going to be married, he told me that this woman, Weslyon, was going to be in attendance at the wedding. So I shouldn’t panic if he “disappeared” for a while. After all, he was my ride.

I was introduced to Weslyon and she was very smart, quirky, and funny. It would come to be that myself, along with Jeremy and his brother, and Weslyon would all hang out together for the rest of the day into the night and the following day.

I remember thinking that it was really awesome to be able to hang out with people my own age, doing whatever we wanted and having no curfews or anything. Just young adults doing what they pleased.

After the wedding, we strolled around in the Wal-Mart for several hours. I would come to find out very quickly that Weslyon was a bit of a prankster of sorts. Very fast on the comebacks. But once you’ve been had, you’ve been had. Props were to be given to her.

We then went out to eat, and then decided to go to the movies. Now this is where this blog dates the whole situation. We went to go see “Men In Black”.

From right to left, was myself-Jeremy-Weslyon-Jeremy’s brother. The “Awesome Foursome Of Friends”.

In the darkness of the theater during the silly advertisements and trivia questions and movie facts, Jeremy’s brother and I noticed that… Jeremy & Weslyon were holding hands.


Well of course now we had to pick on them. We told them that we were not going to tolerate any hanky-panky during the film. And threatened to separate them if they misbehaved.

But my general comment about it was that they’d find a way to still hold hands even if we sent Jeremy to the back of the theater.

"Nobody saw it coming in the darkness. Everyone was shocked."

In the blink of an eye, I felt an excruciating sharp pain across my collar bone. Weslyon had reached over and slapped me, while reaching across Jeremy’s chest. Jeremy to this day claims he never got touched but felt the wind of her swinging arm go by his face.

There I sat, wondering what just happened. I never saw it coming. Not while sitting in the darkness. She didn’t make a sound! For awhile, we nicknamed her “assassin”.

I didn’t say anything. Nobody said anything. Not until after the movie when Weslyon had began to profusely apologize to me for hitting me like that. I could never figure out until probably close to a year after it had happened as to WHY it happened in the first place.

She had misheard what I had said about Jeremy finding a way to still hold hands with her from way back in the theater. What she thought I had said was far worse and perverted, so she retaliated in her defense.

This is how my friendship with Weslyon had started. With a smack across the collar bone due to a misunderstanding. And we still laugh about it to this day.

I found myself with Jeremy & Weslyon one full year after it had happened. I ended up having this conversation with her from the backseat of their vehicle, talking about how it had been one year since that fateful smack. She again apologized and I told her that in memory of it being one year, and neither one of us were dead from killing one another, I bought her a gift.

“Men In Black” on VHS.

The look on her face was priceless. Jeremy lost it, laughing so hard he began to drool on himself. But then Weslyon and I hugged and she thanked me.

Weslyon still is the Queen of comebacks. I’ve not met anyone her equal. She got me good on the telephone yesterday. I was stunned to the point of being speechless. Yep, she’s still got it!! And honestly I hope she never loses it. Life would be dull if she did.

But now I can say that I understand why they say to be silent during the movie, because you never know when the backhand of death will come flying in your direction in the darkness.

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