Dick Measuring In The Cold

“It doesn’t make a difference what temperature a room is, it’s always room temperature.”~Steven Wright

Holy crap, folks!!!

Not minutes after posting the last blog post, a major “dick measuring” contest broke out on social media.

I mentioned the LOCAL temperature here this morning and people from other parts of the country just had to chime in with their local temperature reading, as if it was some sort of contest.

The temperature was not the point of the blog. The fight that people were outside fighting was the point.

So here are some meteorological facts for those who don’t know or for those who just don’t seem to get it:

I’m in Austin, Texas. And Austin, Texas rarely gets as cold as the rest of the nation during the winter months. Although at the beginning of the year, the weather will get very cold but the coldest part of that day will be hours before the sun rises.

Austin, Texas rarely gets temperatures as low as they have been in the past couple of days. Hell, the southern states don’t get as cold as they have been in recent days. Not to mention that Texas doesn’t have a lot of experience with winter-like weather, such as sleet, freezing rain, ice, and snow.

So when these places in the country actually turn cold, you’re going to hear about it on social media. Plain and simple. If it snows in Texas, you are going to hear about it. Even if you have inches of snow on the ground where you are located and have been dealing with freezing temperatures for a while.

Same thing happens when the northern part of the country reaches sweltering heat during the summer. You’re going to hear about it from people in the north because they are not used to it.

There’s no reason for the comparisons to be honest. Just understand that for some people this is a freaky phenomenon that is happening. No need to bust out the plumage on your tail feathers.

I swear, some people’s children!!!

Metallica Conquers The Entire World

“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.”~Bill Cosby

Today, on the very frozen continent of Antarctica, heavy metal pioneers embarked on a journey never traveled before.

A concert on the icy continent for their fans.

I can hear you now… why is this significant?

Because now Metallica can say that they have performed all seven continents in the entire world. They’ve toured for many years and gone around and around and around the globe, and now they can add Antarctica to the list of places where they have played. I cannot be 100% entirely sure because I do not know, but I am not aware of any other musical act who has pulled off playing in all seven continents. So I would hedge before saying that Metallica was the first. But to MY personal knowledge, they are?

I thought it was a crazy stunt. I thought that it was unnecessary. I also doubted that it could be done. But I was proven soooooooooooo wrong today that I should probably go to bed and lay there in my wrongness.

Here is the only full length video I’ve found via YouTube of the action if you either wanna watch it or don’t believe me:

It is of very, very poor quality. But there’s your proof of sorts. Perhaps better and more videos will be uploaded to YouTube as the days go by.

Congratulations to Metallica! Horns up to you guys!!!

Forecast predicts … a rolling of the eyes.

So this is going out to all you people in the Lone Star state.

The current temperatures at the time this is being written is 24 °F/-4 °C . Rather chilly, I’d say. Wouldn’t you?

But you know what? This is also the month of February. Yes I know, its only the third day of it so far, and you’ve been so used to the month of January. And believe me- for personal reasons, if it could remain 30th of January, that would be fine with me. But I digress.

For this area, the forecasts and meterologists have seemed to have gotten together and devised a scheme of dun, dun, dun, “Winter Weather”.

What does this mean? It means that there’s a 70% chance of precipitation. Mainly, “the white stuff”. Sounds important, doesn’t it?

How much snow will this area of Texas receive? Go ahead, I’ll give you a moment to take a guess.

Time’s up!!

“.. up to an INCH!”. HOLY CRAP!!! Someone run me to the grocery store for batteries, bottled water, milk, bread, canned goods, and matches.

Really people? You’re going to go absolutely insane because it might snow and accumulations will be possibly not up to an inch?? You know, the stuff probably won’t even stick around for long. For one, its going to happen overnight. So probably by the time Billy Gene Rotten Mouth has awakened in the morning (because they have either delayed or cancelled school over this), there won’t be anything left on the ground for him to play with. And you’re stuck in the house all day with children because the temperatures are still going to remain as cold as it has been these past few days. Good luck!

Now I know that some parts of the state have been hit hard by this weather that airports in major cities have closed. I feel for them. I honestly do. As well as I feel for the rest of the country who has been dealing with headaches brought on by this winter weather. But central and even south Texas?? Would you just get a grip!?

Temperatures up to this point have been BELOW freezing for a few days now. Everyone saw it coming. They knew it would arrive. And yes, I am aware that some of you must brave the evil and wretched remains of what may or may not be an inch or two on the ground. But its still going to be cold. With or without it. And this is why you should have spent the $55 at Wal-Mart to buy a hat, coat, and gloves. Yes, I looked it up to see how much it all would cost. Plus, you’ve had since last winter to do so. Maybe the money you spent for those those cases of beer you bought last Saturday should have been used for something more useful as news has been reporting about this big storm system for several weeks.

If you are the kind of person that is cold natured. Its called “dressing in layers”. The rest of you, cover yourself. Do what you got to do to protect your family, pets, and plants.

It is cold outside. No kidding! Its winter. No matter what woodchuck did or did not see his/her shadow the other day. Winter isn’t going to just disappear overnight. And besides, don’t worry about how long its going to be frigid outside. In a few months, ya’ll will be bitching about how bloody HOT it is in Texas.