The Myth Of Drinking

“I have absolutely no pleasure in the stimulants in which I sometimes so madly indulge. It has not been in the pursuit of pleasure that I have periled life and reputation and reason. It has been the desperate attempt to escape from torturing memories, from a sense of insupportable loneliness and a dread of some strange impending doom.”~ Edgar Allan Poe

Due to recent events, it is time to set the record straight.

I have been getting asked very frequently in recent days about whether or not I drink. Most specifically if I drink alcoholic beverages.

Most of my social life revolves around live music, which everyone knows. And of course live music venues are usually clubs and bars where the sale of alcohol is their prime business. A large percentage of people that know me, well that’s where they see me. In venues.

Happy to say that they are kind enough to want to buy me a drink. However, 99.98% of the time I either politely decline their offer outright or I tell them that I don’t drink and come up with a counter offer to something like a Coke or a soft drink of some sort.

Ever since I started enjoying live music, this is how I have operated. People are accepting of it and respectful.

The other night however I was spotted by a great number of people enjoying a beer. Suddenly, people were very, VERY confused at what they saw. One person said that they thought that they were dreaming.

And another night, someone said that they saw me having shots with some band members.

So now, this is my public service announcement to those who are stumped, confused, and essentially losing their mind over the subject.

I will start out by actually answering the question: DO I DRINK?

Answer: Yes.

As just about everyone else on the planet, after I surpassed the legal age of drinking, I did have my times of going to the night club, watching people, enjoying music, and drinking. And I learned what my limit was to where I knew that I needed to stop so that by the time I went home, I was sober enough to safely do so.

But after a while the money that I was spending on buying drinks was growing and growing that by the end of the month I didn’t have enough money to feed myself.

I finally stopped going to the night club because it got very boring to me, and I didn’t like how much money I was spending on drinks. I even stopped going to the store to buy alcohol.

This went on for a while and if I was drinking anything at all, it was at someone’s home. Usually during a dinner or some small gathering of friends.

And now with the atmosphere of live music, and the passage of time, the idea of drinking is less appealing. But that is mainly due to the COST of buying alcohol.

The other factor is whether or not the restrooms in the venue are actually accessible. If I am not able into a restroom at a venue or have a lot of difficulty doing so, then I will simply choose not to drink. And a lot of the times when I politely refuse it is because of the accessibility situation. And that is commonly what the situation is. If I cannot properly relieve myself when I am away from home…. I won’t drink.

My travels in recent years to Houston, I may have ONE beer if anything. But that is only because the venues that I have attended are not accessible at all. Some in Austin are a lot easier but not quite what I would need to make sure that I can get the business done.

Having Spina Bifida makes consuming alcohol more of a pain in the ass!! It goes through the bladder a lot faster than the average person. To put this very bluntly, if I am at some venue and I have a drink or whatever and I have to urinate, because of the decrease in bodily function and control, all it takes those few seconds that I am transferring from the wheelchair to the toilet before it just comes pouring out of me getting all over me and my clothes. And essentially making me unfit for social interaction for the rest of the night.

There have been times when I have been on antibiotics or other medication that warn against drinking while taking it. Thankfully, that is not the case all of the time.

So I am NOT necessarily against drinking. It has nothing to do with personal beliefs or anything like that. I’m not necessarily restricted from drinking. It just depends on where I am and what I am able to do when nature strikes. It obviously would be a lot easier to deal with at home as I can just clean up and if need be change clothes. It is not that easy to do when I am not at home. Even if I take extra with me.

And I am definitely NOT trying to offend anyone or hurt their feelings when they want to buy me a drink and I say no or counter offer them with something else. It is just my way of self-preservation.

I AM against the idea of being drunk and trying to ride the bus home. Bus drivers are instructed to deny passengers too inebriated from riding. I have witnessed others being told to get off the bus. I don’t wish to be stranded somewhere when I am not close to home. Or at all!!

So for those reading who have tried to buy me drinks, keep in mind the following:

If I can’t easily get into the rest rooms where I am at. I won’t drink.

If I am on medication, I won’t drink.

I will not go beyond my personal limit of consuming alcohol.

I have no problem with your courtesy, in fact it is appreciated. In fact, I would LOVE To have a drink with you!! And I will always thank you later for it. But there are just parameters that I follow when the question of drinking comes up.

I hope this answers the questions that you have had and/or clears up any confusion. Feel free to start a conversation in the comments below if there’s anything that I missed.

The Bobbitt Syndrome

“I’m crazy and I don’t pretend to be anything else.”~ Rihanna

Ever since the “famous incident” that happened in 1993 between John and Lorena Bobbitt, and the mass hysteria that the media infused with it by putting it all over television and print and keeping it there for much longer than it needed to be, I swear the world has gone absolutely insane.

And if I am not mistaken, it was the same year or time that the Amy Fisher affair was broken into the public.

MERCY!! Don’t these people have any lives to live?

We can turn on any television set, power up our own computers and even phones now, and see these idiotic stories come crashing down on us like a tidal wave.

Yet when someone does something brave, noble, or fierce, we never hear about it.

I don’t know how many times in the past 20+ years that some woman lost her stupid mind and bit the penis of a man, if not totally severing it from his body. Those are some strong chompers. Ask Armin Meiwes if you don’t believe me!!!

The Bobbitt Syndrome has begun. And it has spread like wildfire. And it doesn’t even need to. 

To my own knowledge, you never hear it the other way around. I would love for someone to explain that one to me.

 

Aren’t women thinking ahead when they do this? Usually this kind of assault is done to a lover or a boyfriend/husband. Don’t you realize that its there for your pleasure at times when you are NOT MAD AT HIM???? Why would you do something like this to your man???

It is ridiculous!

Now that it is bitten off or at least damaged, its not going to work the way you were used to it working. And seriously, you’re now going to have to go through all of this “training” again with your man because you were pissed off and stupid (or drunk and high) and went after his manhood. 

Are you proud of yourself now?

But I’m way off the train of thought that I had when I thought to write about this.

This story has become so popularized, its not funny. Yeah, I remember laughing about Bobbitt and his incident, but when the media pumps it through their lines every time it is reported by law enforcement…. the story becomes less and less and less and less interesting or entertaining for lack of a better term.

All in all… this is the latest and greatest if you want to dare read about it.

Have fun, you biters!!

 

http://www.kjrh.com/news/local-news/woman-arrested-for-maiming-after-man-claims-girlfriend-tried-to-bite-his-penis-off

Taking And Losing Control With Fear Control: 11 April 2014- Dirty Dog Bar

“Last chance to take a stand
Finally lets kill this man
Loss of fear now takes control
Lost my chance to save my soul
Now there’s no turning back
Now’s the time we must attack
The end of your reign has come
Swift vengeance now be done” ~ ‘Off With His Head’ by Fear Control

I sadly missed the Texas Independence Fest today  with CASKET OF CASSANDRA playing along side other bands with big name recording labels such as Behemoth and Goatwhore.

But I went to the pre-party the night before. Again to the Dirty Dog. I realized that I had not been out in a few weeks so the bus ride was a little wonky even though it seemed like I got there in no time.

One of the bartenders actually took the time to introduce himself because he said that he had been seeing me a lot and wanted to say hello. He kept my hands filled with Coke whenever he saw that I was done drinking one.

It felt good to get out of the house. Especially since it was the beginning of the weekend and I started to hear chatter about other people’s plans of showing up at the venue.

Some actually showed up. Others did not. But I was definitely there for Fear Control as I have been in close communication with guitarist Frankie Rodriguez and lead singer and guitarist Kash Sakaria. They KNOW that I am pretty much obsessed with their song “Off With His Head” and proud of it.

I was very much happy to see most of the members of CASKET OF CASSANDRA there at the Dirty Dog. They had one missing due to work. But they were also busy with getting ready for the Texas Independence Fest. So they stayed for a while before taking off.

Meanwhile, I kind of was splitting my time between CASKET OF CASSANDRA and Fear Control’s guitarist.

After a while the show got started and soon enough things were going up and up. Like I have been saying every time I write one of these show reviews for my blog, whenever I am sticking around long enough to hear OTHER bands… I end up getting swept up into some other band.  And that show was no exception to the rule.

Trauma Concept

I couldn’t understand a lot but what I could hear, between listening to music and being involved in conversation I got swept up in two different bands by the time the night was over.

First band was Trauma Concept. I don’t know what it was, there was just something about them that caught my attention and then I ended up being stuck either in front of the stage or off to the side of the stage and just listening and watching.

I went to their merchandise table and gobbled up everything that they had to offer.

I did the same thing for Nekrist who played later in the evening.

But I was for sure about Trauma Concept.

After that there was one band on the bill that kind of made me A LOT nervous.

Whore Of Bethlehem

Whore Of Bethlehem.

I had no idea what to expect. I had no idea what they were up to. I had no idea what their gimmick was. All I know is that their band logo was on the bass drum on the drum kit.

The thrashing death screaming vocals that came out of this guy was amazing. I had never experienced anything like that in my life. And the band was probably singing a song about slaughtering angels or someone innocent or puppies or something.

So after that I took a look at their business that they had to offer.

I didn’t know that the woman that was standing by the table was the girlfriend of the lead singer. And since I didn’t know her name at the time (and cannot remember it now even though she told me) I referred to her as “Satan’s girlfriend.”

Death/Black metal….. even they get the ladies. But had I known that’s who she was… I would have left it alone. I took a photograph with two members of Whore Of Bethlehem, and then turned around and took one with the woman who literally said “Let me get my boyfriend to take the picture.”

I knew then to stay clear, but I didn’t realize it would be the guy screaming his heart and soul and lungs out on stage minutes before.

Scary situation!!! But I survived.

The band is local. So that means these people and this woman are local. And I live in a city of over a million people and that means I’ll probably never cross paths with them again, at least not on the street. Maybe at some other venue or show though… that would be possible.

Kash Sakaria

I did however think that it was really cool that Frankie allowed me to hold his guitar and pick a little at it. Then he took a photograph with my camera. I’m happy he allowed that. I begged Kash not that long ago to do the same thing with his guitar but …. no such luck so far.

KASH!! BROTHER!! Please!! Just one photograph with the guitar!! Lemme know….

And then came the problem of the night: ALCOHOL.

What I mean by that is FREE alcohol.

I’ve always thought that fans were responsible for giving bands their buzz. I never thought that bands would souse their fans.

I cannot count how many people had bought me so many cocktails and beers. And you know what they say about mixing them or drinking them in the wrong order. Ughhh!!!!

From all of that happening and the free Coke that I was getting myself, it made for a long, long, long, long night when I returned home and an excruciating morning afterwards. And again, not a single penny was coming out of my wallet for these beverages. I got to the point where I didn’t even know where they were coming from. Just that I would look up and there were more beers, more cocktails sitting there in front of me. 

Fear Control hit the stage and they started to tune up, set up, and I was ready for action again. Sweat pouring down my face as I began to wonder whether or not to change t-shirts in the bathroom. I received a very limited edition WHITE t-shirt from Fear Control.

Basically, they only had a few more left. And now I have one.

I was happy to hear that my favorite song was on the set list. I do not know why I would have ever thought that they would take it off of the set list. At least not right now. Perhaps down the road when more new songs are written.

I must say that I am really enjoying the song “Texas Tea” as well. Its basically a drinking anthem.

But “Off With HisHead” was a very surprising OPENING song to their set.

I lost it!!! But in a good way.

Singing along and just having a fun time. As their set went on, I realized that some drunken idiots attempted to start a mosh pit. The only way that I know is that someone bumped into me as he was shoved in my general direction from behind me.

Ohhhh crap. Not this again. I had problems enough with this going on at SXSW Festival this year and I probably would have had a little bit more help as this was a venue. The fine folks at the Festival probably would not have done a thing.

Suddenly “Satan’s girlfriend” comes up to me while I was enjoying “Off With His Head” and I turned around away from the stage and she took a photograph of me in front of the band playing on stage.

That was cool. But then mosh pit was getting a little more active and a little too close for comfort for me. My back is damaged enough from assholes in the past who injured me over trying to steal something that had less than $20 value, I don’t need some drunk guy ramming into me and then trying to start something with me because he slammed into the back of my wheelchair and he hurt himself and me in the process.

I think that “Satan’s girlfriend” saw the concern and fear in my face. So she put her arm around my shoulders and stood there throughout the rest of the song that was playing.

I slowly turned back behind me and I saw him AND his girlfriend nearby.

And instead of having the feeling of the possibility that they were going to protect me from people slamming into me…. I felt fear again. Thankfully I never “touched” her or put my hands on her that would cause trouble.

After Fear Control, the lead singer to Trauma Concept walked by. He shook my hand saying, “Hey, I just wanted to say thank you for getting all of our shit.” Ohhhh if he only knew…. if he only knew.

A $5 cover and free drinks and merchandise. I came out of there like a fricking bandit!!

So I took off at the end of the night and had to get a taxi or something since buses stopped running. I found this giant extended van that was sitting there and this guy assisted me in finding this van. He looked to see how far my home was in miles and then did some kind of weird calculation and said that he could get me home for $25.

Well, that’s fine. Taxis are about $20…. so its pretty close. But that van was right there and I didn’t have to sit there on any sidewalk, yelling and waving like a fool and an idiot trying to pull someone over. The guy was ready to go. All I had to do was climb inside…. which was a pain because the van was so high up. But I made it. 

Come to find out that the driver was ALSO in a band and his band was in the recording studio. He mentioned that he wanted to give me his card and that if I found the band on Facebook that he would connect with me and give me merchandise……….. FOR FREE. Again, with the free merchandise!!

Has anyone that has been reading these band show posts writing this stuff down on how this is working??

Earlier in the day prior to the show, I sent messages to both Kash and Frankie stating that a storm was coming.

Boy did it ever!!!! Now someone please hand me a glass of water and a few tylenol and grab me the trash can and don’t wake me up until June. Unless there is another show that I can go to.

Sexual Favors Of Law Enforcement

“When your dad’s a cop, calling 911 is really just like calling Dad at work.“~Ryan Reynolds

I’m real close to considering a separate and totally new blog about the stupidity of humanity as it comes to my knowledge and separating everything by state.

I have a feeling that Florida would probably be a full blog with plenty of posts. This would be one of them.

Honestly, how many times have I written in this blog about something stupid happening in Florida?

http://www.policeone.com/bizarre/articles/6905602-Fla-woman-asks-for-sex-from-cop-dials-911-after-denial/

Thankfully to find out that this woman was very much so intoxicated. I would personally much prefer that they threw every law book in existence at her for wasting safety resources and the time of law enforcement.

But in any case… since a huge majority of my readership/followers are female– after reading the article, enjoy the eye candy.

You’re welcome, ladies!!!!!!!!!!

3 February 2014: Gettin’ Dirty with Casket of Cassandra

“I stare in the eyes of death.” ~ “Solitaria” by Casket of Cassandra

I was too far gone last night to be writing about this in the blog. And you’ll understand more as you read.

But last night in Austin, Texas was the battle to get into the Texas Independence Fest.

With one band in particular that I’ve come to really enjoy in the last month, Casket of Cassandra.

They originally come out of California, but have come to Austin, Texas to be closer to their current record label. This is at least what I am understanding.

So the Dirty Dog Bar was hosting this contest and on a whim, I took off running for it. I wanted to see Casket of Cassandra play live.

I wanted to see what else they had.  And I wanted to see what they could do live. And I’ve only known about them about a month. Since they very first day of 2014.

Needless to say, that I am totally addicted to their latest and greatest song, “Solitaria” which if you know me… is no surprise.

Never meeting them in person or anything before. I attempted to get to infamous Sixth Street before it got dark.

That planned failed.  The whole show got put on hold until a couple of hours later. I would learn by some of the members of Casket of Cassandra that it was because a ton of bands had bailed on the night.

And I am going to say this right now: I HATE SAN JACINTO BLVD. Who in the hell thought that was a good idea for downtown?

Very frustrating.

But once I finally got to the club, things got better. Tons better. Almost too good. 

I was finally able to meet Amanda Maddera, vocalist for Casket of Cassandra. She’s really nice and awfully sweet.

Within time, I would come to say hello to the rest of the band. It was really cool for the majority of them to just talk and hang out and laugh about whatever came up. Mainly we all giggled because I had gone into the men’s room and scribbled the name of the band and their new song on the walls of the bathroom stall and they totally thought that was a trip.

Amanda Maddera, vocalist of Casket of Cassandra

When it was time, they were all serious and by the books. They had a job to do.

I have to say that I did not know exactly what to expect from Casket of Cassandra. But I was totally blown away by their performances on stage. Everyone clicked in with one another.

Amanda has the kind of screaming vocals that will melt the skins and faces off of demons, and make Satan himself shutter while thinking… “Ohhhhhh shit!!!”

Between having a conversation with her and then seeing her on stage is the difference between winter’s night and summer’s day.

Isaac Holliday, guitarist for Casket of Cassandra

Amanda Maddera could give Angela Gossow a good run for her money, vocals wise.

I personally would not be offended if Casket of Cassandra did a cover of “We Will Rise” by Arch Enemy, just to see how well Amanda would hold up with the vocals. I mean, she is one awesome and scary mofo when that microphone is turned on and in her hands.

I was totally astonished and impressed with guitarist Isaac Holliday. It was because of his mother that I got to know the band. So I have a lot to be thankful for with her.

And still Isaac is a complete insane beast when he plays on stage. I have never seen such things more terrifying and awesome both at the same time from any guitarist.

The one thing about Isaac that made me freak out is the fact that he got up on stage barefoot and rocked the entire set until the end. And he didn’t just stay in the standing position either. He drew energy from crowd and was everywhere.

I knew that his mother was proud of him and his accomplishments and his decision to be a part of this band. And now I know WHY she is so proud.

If I started up my old band again, and was to start fresh… I’d do everything I could to get Isaac to say YES to the project. I’m hoping that Isaac will forward the photograph of the band name that was written on the bathroom wall to me soon. I wanna see how that turned out.

So the only way to describe Casket of Cassandra’s performance last night would be:

COMPLETE AND TOTAL HIGH VOLTAGE!!

And then came the end of the eargasm. A musical cockblock by staff members of the Dirty Dog. Amanda had announced that they had one more song, but they were being told to get off the stage and that they were done.

That one song… Solitaria. They intended to rock out with it at the very end, and never got a chance to play it. I was crushed. I was broken down. And of course I was pissed off. I am hoping that VERY SOON that I will catch them playing live again and that they WILL play the song.

I sat there thinking to myself that if I were them, I probably would have just gone ahead and played it, regardless. Because hey, this is heavy metal and so shove it!!!

What’s the worst they could have done? Turned off the microphones? Amanda and Riles (backing vocals and guitarist) would have just sang without the microphones and still killed the crowd. At least that is my biased opinion.

And I remember sitting there, staring at Amanda as she was breaking down the stage. I shouted “I came out into the Texas cold for this, for Solitaria. And I just threw your band’s name on the walls of the stall in the men’s room.”

The Thirsty Goat

Amanda looked at me oddly and grinned. And now, I just don’t blame her for that reaction.

Dambreaker …….. was D-R-U-N-K last night!!!!!!!!!

And it was not funny, at all.

Two of these bad boys and several shots. All of that was BEFORE Casket of Cassandra even got on stage.

For someone who doesn’t drink a lot of alcohol, and has refused all but two drinks of liquor when going to Houston to see SIX MINUTE CENTURY or any other Houston band play, the delectable amber brew was too much. And of course the sting of the Tequila.

My apartment manager loves the idea of me getting out of the house as much as possible. Particularly if it involves doing something that I enjoy– such as music. Each and every time I want to go out and see this band or that band play, he is all for it.

He knew someone who was working at the bar who goes by the name of HOLLYWOOD, and I was to introduce myself. HOLLYWOOD decided to buy shots.

On top of that, I was given some cash to enjoy a drink, courtesy of my manager. His suggestion was the Thirsty Goat.

It is SO DELICIOUS! But it is also the complete and total DEVIL!!

I’m afraid after two of those and all of that Tequila, there was no saving Dambreaker. I am surprised that I even made it home on the bus. Luckily, the men’s room at the Dirty Dog Bar are VERY KIND to the ADA community. And that was such a welcomed relief, pun intended. I think that’s what curbed off some if not most of the inebriation.

So with all of that going on, I don’t fault Amanda for her reaction at all. That was kinda stupid on my behalf. DUH!!!

And that is why there wasn’t a chance of me being able to write about this when I got home last night. Too drunk. For like the first time in …. YEARS.

I dropped the digital camera that was given to me and I’m hoping it comes back to life soon. Cement floors in bars. I hate them. But at least though I look awesome while gliding across them in my wheelchair.

I didn’t get a photograph with the entire band like I would always do. Hopefully that will come at a later time.

And this morning I learned that this entire battle last night, Casket of Cassandra actually WINS!! So that was really awesome. They are set to play a show at Emo’s in April with HUGE artists with HUGE recording labels behind them. Its going to be great for the band!!

So I sit and wait for the next show. Hoping for more. Craving Solitaria!!!

Check out the band at their Facebook page:

https://www.facebook.com/casketofcassandra

Causing Problems At Bars On Karaoke Night

“A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It’s jolted by every pebble on the road.”~ Henry Ward Beecher 

I guess some drunk people just can’t take a joke sometimes. But I knew that eventually I was going to get into trouble some day.

Karaoke night. And the first thing that happened when I went through the front door was someone coming up to me asking if I was going to participate in singing karaoke. Of which I didn’t realize was going on.

Since I have done so in the past at that particular place, I agreed. Without skipping a beat, the person who was asking gave me a list of songs that I was banned from singing.

Banned.

Wow! Seriously? And they apparently were.

It was a list of pop songs with my name on it at the top a full page long of various songs that I have sung in the past and won their karaoke contests with in a landslide vote by bar patrons.

And now I’m banned from singing them ever again in that establishment. And one another has banned me from singing one pop song in particular. That is if I am wanting to be a part of their karaoke contests.

I never actually take their prizes. Usually its just free drinks or a free entree or whatever. And since I do not drink, I never use it. I always give it to someone else before I leave.

Okay, whatever. So this forced me to go through their “book” to find something to sing that I was comfortable with, and that I could work with in my vocal range.

I had one problem. One very huge problem. The book was full of country karaoke music.

But as I went through the book and worked towards the end, I saw something listed on a page that was familiar with me. It was written in the genre of country music too. Everyone who sang ahead of me were singing country.

So I selected the song, “Good Enough For Now” by none other than “Weird Al” Yankovic.

Since most of you have not been living under a rock, I do not have to explain who that is. But when you have a room full of people who are drinking tons of beer and enjoying country music, this selection was ripe with disaster. I just wouldn’t know it yet until I got settled on the stage.

I had a very tough act to follow. The guy who was singing before me, had brought his girlfriend up near the stage and he sang John Michael Montgomery’s version of the song, “I Swear”. To which brought her to tears and many people who watch this magical romantic moment.

How the heck am I going to dazzle a crowd in which the winner is chosen by applause and THAT kind of thing happens? There is just no beating that kind of act!!

I watched the crowd, and I selected two women that I would “sing to”. One extremely drunk, the other pretty wild, drunk, and dressed very slutty celebrating her 21st birthday. It was too easy to select the birthday girl for this rather amusing and funny gag.

I sang this song to the two women and I nearly was torn off the stage by them both. By the first for most of the song, and then by the second woman by the end of the song. Of which I might add was not a karaoke version. I had to sing along with the album version.

They should have realized that by the second line of the song, that this was all just a big joke.

One of them, I guess it might have been a husband or boyfriend was standing there with a beer rushed the stage and stuck his middle finger in my face and screaming with a resounding “Hey, fuck you buddy!!”. 

I kept singing. I moved away when I could but he would follow. But then when I turned my attention to the second girl (the birthday girl), he stopped. But then the second girl was throwing a fit and that was probably because she was embarrassed. She was just so awfully tempting to pick out because she was so loud and obnoxious and of course, drunk out of her mind.

I got yelled and screamed at for a while after I got off the stage A lot of people shouted their obscenities at me. Luckily nobody came after me and started a physical confrontation.

If you want to know why this caused such a problem, you can find the song on YouTube or you can Google search the lyrics.

The song came off of the album “Polka Party” which was released in October 1986. I thought for sure that many of these people would find the humor. I thought wrong. Maybe everyone in this crowd were born AFTER 1986? I don’t know.

I just know that if I am going to be “banned” from singing songs, and my hands are tied behind my back when everyone is doing country songs, I’m going to go at it in my own way. Which I did.

I even said during the musical solo into the microphone that it was just a joke. Nobody found it funny Except for a couple of people way in the back sitting at the bar who was laughing to themselves when they heard me singing the words to the song.

I wasn’t going to win. But then again I never planned to join the contest in the first place. I was just trying to get out of the house and have some fun and relax. This is probably no longer the place to do that any more.

I’m still trying to wrap around my mind of how they can “ban” me from singing specific songs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

P.S.A. #1

While you were glued to the television set for every ounce of reports of the pre-game shows, sat through the abortion version of the National Anthem, screamed and yelled at every play of the entire game of Super Bowl XLV, stuffing your face with snacks and getting drunk… remember this:

I was on the Internet, talking to your girlfriend and/or wife.

Thank you.