Posts Tagged ‘first time’

“But I learned that there’s a certain character that can be built from embarrassing yourself endlessly. If you can sit happy with embarrassment, there’s not much else that can really get to ya.”~ Christian Bale
 
Someone who had heard my tale thought that this would be a funny blog post. But I don’t know. I suppose I will allow that distinction to be determined by my readers.
 
I was discussing that way back when, in a galaxy far, far away……………
 
I was at a pot luck dinner and a woman came up to me and asked if I had ever eaten tamales. I said that I had not. So then of course the response from her was, “Oh, you must try it! You’ll love it!”. So I agreed to at least give it a try.
 
Nobody told me what tamales were. They didn’t mention anything about the husks or what you are supposed to do with it, or the masa inside and what it was made out of.
 
Tacos and burritos were not a problem. Even enchiladas I knew about and had them from time to time. Tamales? Not up until that point!
 
I went to sit down and eat. Being that it was a pot luck, I had more than just the unusual Mexican cuisine on my plate. But eventually, I got around to it.
 
I took my fork and my knife and without knowing what the heck I was supposed to be doing… I began to cut.
 
Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut. Cut.
 
This tamale was particularly stubborn I had thought. It took me nearly 40 minutes to actually separate it from the rest of itself.
 
That’s right… 40 MINUTES OF CUTTING into something that I didn’t know what to do with in the first place.
 
Once I stopped cutting, I had problems getting it to stay on the fork. The masa fell out of the husk. So then I stabbed it with all of my might and then stabbed the cut piece of husk and put it all into my mouth before it began to fall of the fork another time.
 
I thought that the tamale tasted pretty good! The masa just melted and slid down my throat. But that stupid husk wasn’t going anywhere. It just rolled around in my mouth. I couldn’t chew it to where I could swallow it.
 
Eventually in my disgust, I secretly spit it out.
 
Then I grabbed my knife and fork again, and began to cut on the tamale again to repeat this long and tedious process of consuming Mexican cuisine.
 
The woman who had made them originally walked by and saw what I was doing.
 
She laughed so hard that she began to turn red in the face. Had there not been a chair just behind her, she would have fallen flat on her butt. She couldn’t breathe because she was laughing so hard. And I sat there, trying to get this thing to cut and wondering what in the world was so funny.
 
When she regained her breath, she got up and walked over to me. She softly put her arms around my shoulders and whispered into my ear, “Honey, you’re supposed to peel off the husk and eat what’s on the inside, not eat the entire thing.”
 
Great! Some information I could have used ALMOST AN HOUR BEFORE!!
 
The other foods on my plate suffered great losses. The hot food turned cold and the cold food turned hot. You get the idea!!
 
But honestly, it being my first experience with tamales, how was I to really know?
 
From that point on, I think that I’ve had tamales only twice or three times??
 
Definitely a moment of embarrassment. But it could have been a lot worse than what it was. Even though the stupid husk would never break down for me to chew and eat. Or even cut for that matter.
 
Oh well, life is full of wild adventures and experiences.

“Don’t cry because it’s over. Smile because it happened…” ~ Dr. Seuss

Very powerful words there. This coming from an author with the most expansive imagination and capable of entertaining small children. I’d still hate to find out who his illustrator was. I digress.

Life has its cycles, its chapters. With every beginning, must come an end. And of course they always say that in order to open one door, you must close another.

I believe that it is challenging enough without all of these fancy words being tossed around from all sides, only to say those words that you honestly never wanted to hear in the first place. Just because they are not telling you those words, doesn’t mean that they are not saying them.

I said farewell to a friend today. I knew that it was coming though. And it was not a matter of fight or disagreement. Their life simply came to the end of another chapter and so tomorrow morning, they will begin a new one. Unfortunately that meant without me.

Many people come and go throughout our lives. We meet the most wonderful and glorious of people and we also meet the scourge of what we consider to be the most horrible waste of space. Yet those whom we can hold on to for long periods of time, we able, willing, and happy consider them “friends”.

I wish my friend well in their newest adventures of life. And I hope that the prosper to the best of their ability. And who knows? Anything is possible. In this I truly believe. Yet the chances that I will meet up with them again, are next to nothing.

After a long pause in silence and staring at one another, they left and I watched them get into their vehicle and drive off until I was no longer to see their back bumper as it turned into just a tiny dot on the horizon as they climbed the hill along the street that they were driving.

It didn’t really hit me until I had returned home. Realizing that there would be no more phone calls, no more e-mails. I was absolutely overwhelmed. And this really got me thinking about certain things. Mainly the different types of relationships I have with each individual person that I know and have grown fond of.

In the past three years, I have met some incredible people. I say “met”, but not really. Simply put, several people that I have come to know, I have known them from being online. The person that left today was of no exception. Even though they did live closer to me than others whom I associate with frequently.

Now it is true, that I have actually “met” people who have been totally amazing and quite the asset to my life. These are the kinds of people that I would do anything for. We all have those kinds of people in our lives, I think. “Blind Faith” is what I call it.

There are those people that I have become more of acquainted with from online, and the joy that I felt on those days when I was able to meet them face to face. It really is a wonderful feeling in my book.

Yet as I sat upon my couch, staring up at the ceiling, each individual person came to mind that I have grown to know better and better throughout these past few years. What a solemn and frightful moment that would run through my mind, had I not done what I have done in the past to make these people all that more important to me in my life. Had I not known them as well as I do today. And the fearful illusion of actually coming to know these people even better, only to have either never met them in person at all, or met only one time in my life. As was the case with this friend who just left.

Over a year of e-mails and chats and lengthy phone calls led to what seemed to have been a friendship that had been going on for decades. And never once met in person. But I had that opportunity today to meet them for the first time, at least in person. We acted as if this fact was never a part of it. As if we had been around each other the entire time.

I had become the fortunate one today. To have been able to have that opportunity. And still, even though I should concentrate on the fun that was had earlier… I sat there, sighing.

My hands trembling in sync with my bottom lip when the visionary mind games came into place about whether or not I would meet those whom I truly want to meet deep down in my heart of hearts. And the terrible scare of this happening again with them after it was all said and done.

One… And… Done.

To be fair, I think that if I were to meet someone in person and things just didn’t go very well then I would have to agree that “yeah, maybe meeting again is not the right thing to do.” But who wants to think about that??? I sure don’t.

I want to be positive, yet firm, cautious, and open-minded. After all, who goes on a blind date in this day and age and even before you get there, you think to yourself, “Good grief, I hope I never meet this person ever again!”. I don’t think anyone does. If they have, I am sure that their doctors can lead them towards the correct medication and treatment that they are needing.

I have been there too many times in my life, where I have met someone (whether it be from online or not) and I never heard from them again. For me, its not a great feeling. I do not like it! I simply don’t do well in that kind of situation.

Even within the past 12 months, I have become rather commonly acquainted with some really fantastic people. Male, female. Tall, short. Old, young. All of them though: just wonderful as can be.

Some of you may remember in a previous post a few months ago about my trip to Houston. Those people were absolutely incredible. And the thought of never seeing them again, just isn’t an option for me tonight.

I have now developed a determination. I WILL see them again! It may not be tomorrow, it may not even be next month or even next year. But I WILL see them. And I’ve also determined that those whom I have endeared for so very long, and have not met yet, I shall see them as well. And with the exception of some unforeseen tragedy, I WILL see them again.

Where there’s a will, there’s a way. You bet your sweet bottom line there is! And I will find it. So here I come world of friends, colleagues, and acquaintances. If you will have me, I will be there!

And if it does come to the fact that I never really DO see these people again, it will only be because circumstances were as such that I could not control. And I will be happy that I have been able to do it the first time.

Look out world! Dambreaker is on the move!!