Posts Tagged ‘mean’

triomphe-de-la-volonte-01-gArrogance on the part of the meritorious is even more offensive to us than the arrogance of those without merit: for merit itself is offensive.“~Friedrich Nietzsche

Let me explain before people start freaking out about the image here and I will show you how this relates to this post. This blog post is meant specifically and ONLY for the release of my frustration from earlier.

So before you go rushing off to “report” me, just hear me out and let me take this moment to let loose of my tense frustrations.

If you have kept up with this blog since or near the beginning, you’ll remember one of my neighbors that I affectionately have nicknamed “The Prophet.” I don’t remember exactly what started it. I just know that it STUCK!

The Prophet seems to think that everything is owed to her on a silver and gold plate, with diamonds and pearls. And that there is nobody on the planet that she waits for.  A former police officer of over 30 years, and a really big ego and sense of entitlement. Its horrible. I mean, ever since she moved in she burned down every bridge there was between herself and any human being who lived here.

Today was no different. But I had blocked her from getting into the apartment manager’s office this morning as he JUST walked in the door and she was hot on his heels. Hell, let the man get comfy and in the zone before people start grating at him.

So she walked away, proclaiming that she was next in line. But then proceeded to walk OUT the back door of the community room and office. I spoke my peace to the manager and then left. I went into the community room for more morning coffee and then some time later on, The Prophet came back into the building and she came after me.

After being caught in a corner, she began to whine and complain about someone else who lives here. Someone else who was also in the room. So she began to whisper.

She began to bitch and moan about the woman we affectionately named “The Constable” who is 45 years old but has the literal mind of a nine year old child, or younger. Nothing she can do about it either.

She comes into our community room every morning and makes the coffee. She takes out the trash went the cans get full. She displays food whenever it is being offered to the residents. And she’s always cleaning up the room as much as possible without getting in the way of the job of our maintenance man.

The Prophet however came to me and was snarling about The Constable and how she acts … (and here’s the offensive quote)…… “Like some goddamned Community Room Nazi.”

Wha…………. WOW!!!!

Picking on a mentally disabled woman for wanting to help. For volunteering her days to help make things nicer for everyone day after day after day. And you’re pissed because every time you come into the community room, you are seeing her either handling food or drink or in the kitchen without failure. This is coming from a woman who claims to have so much immune system problems that a speck of sunshine could kill her. Which is a gross exaggeration, but you get the point.

The Prophet is the one that no longer has friends with ANY of our 65+ residents who live here. NONE of them left!!! She is more tolerated over anything else. And without friends, you have nothing better to do but to tear people down. People who cannot defend themselves. People who have NO IDEA what they are doing half of the time due to some disability. 

And you compare this woman to a Nazi?

What in the world is wrong with you?!?!? You aren’t even old enough to remember that time period where they ruled across Europe. You’re probably not even really old enough to live here, by the age standard but have enough physical disability to qualify.

It was the most offensive thing I had ever heard with my very own ears in a very long time. And again, it was local. I could NOT believe it. Absolute shame on this woman!!! Shame be upon The Prophet. Now I’m in the corner of the Constable because she has no idea that it was said, and it shouldn’t have been said about her or anyone for that matter to begin with.

Disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

youre-a-douchebag

“If it was legal to shoot all of the stupid people in the world, we would run out of bullets.”~ Dambreaker

This morning, I strolled on over to the corner store. I went up the hill and some random guy shouted at me asking if I wanted any help getting to the top of the hill.

Before I could politely decline, this very muscle-bound man came up behind me and shoved me over the top of the hill and then he kept going even when I was on level ground again.

It was like being blasted like a rocket into outer space.

Sometimes I allow people to help, sometimes I do not.

So then he wanted to know what the reasons were that I was in a wheelchair. And I told him.

His response was the worst thing that I have ever heard in my entire life!!!!

He told me that he couldn’t understand how I could live my life this way, being stuck in a wheelchair all day and night for the rest of my life.

Honestly, when I explain my disability, I do not normally expect people to have that light turn on and they fully understand what all I have to go through every day of my life. What he said next, ruined my entire day.

He honestly looked me in the face and said that he could never life the rest of his life in a wheelchair, and that he would just kill himself before he was confined to a wheelchair like that.

I was filled with shock, rage, and disbelief.

I asked him if he felt that was his solution. If people that live in wheelchairs should just kill themselves.

And then the rage and disbelief continued to grow.

He said with a straight face that he just couldn’t understand why more people don’t do it.

I told him a story about a man who was born in Austria who would eventually become the leader of a country called Germany in the 1930’s. That man also had the same solution. He called it the Final Solution.

Yes, I compared him to Adolf Hitler. Although Hitler’s rage was more focused on the Jewish and other classes of society. But he did exterminate and kill anyone who were in wheelchairs and were physically disabled as well.

Before he had time to react, I told him that he simply needed to go away and leave me alone.

I did have my 23” broken hockey stick with me. And yes, I could have chosen to smack him with it. But because of his muscle bound body, I felt that I would have lost that battle.

Now I have really heard some stupid things from people who do not understand the life that I have to live. And I’ve probably heard every little joke, insult, or remark in the book. And I’ve learned to just roll my eyes. But this one? It hurt. And it hurt a lot.

I came home. Began to cry, and ended up falling asleep for about an hour. I woke up, still angry at the guy. And I really do not wish to ever see him again.

It is like this guy’s brain wasn’t attached to his spinal cord. There’s a reason why there is a brain inside of his skull and its not to fill up the space inside. And why he chose not to use it before he opened his mouth is beyond me. disabled-veteran

Why should I kill myself? Why should anyone with a disability kill themselves?

And what of our nation’s veterans. Ironically those people who have fought and sacrificed their limbs so this guy can keep his freedoms to say stupid things like that?

Should they kill themselves as well because they are now in wheelchairs for defending our country?

The bottom line answer is not just no but HELL NO!

I’ve talked about thinking before you speak, and this is an excellent example of that NOT happening at all!

I have tough skin, but this time it broke through. And I really shouldn’t have to put up with that kind of immaturity and stupidity.

There’s nothing wrong with me that I should have to die. Just because I do not walk and often appear that I may be having trouble getting up hills. Good grief!!!

So this guy is a complete and total douchebag. And who knows what his deal is? Having to say something like probably just to make himself feel better?? Nobody will ever know.

But I am NOT going to throw in the towel like that. You can just screw off if you think like that. We have enough difficulty as it is, we don’t need your psychological stupidity on top of it.

 

“But, truly, I have wept too much! The Dawns are heartbreaking. Every moon is atrocious and every sun bitter.”~ Arthur Rimbaud
The one thing that started out as an announcement of pleasant, much happier news turned into a 70 minute fiasco against my emotions, feelings, and thought process. No matter how I fought it to allow that person to say what they felt, and then move on, only found me sitting there listening to them hit the repeat button.
 
Harsh criticisms and negative thinking in a fiery abundance which totally surpassed the original content of my conversation which was the joyful news of something positive and happy that happened to me today.
 
I wondered if they were even considering what they were telling me over and over and over again. After all, at last check, I am still human.
 
The only thing to do, was to walk away. Which I did- abruptly.
 
Guess what that did? Made me worse of a bad guy. As I gained a distance between myself and my “mental punisher”, I don’t think that it was anything short of a miracle that I made it within the walls of my home without shedding a single tear.
 
In every new experience, I’m frequently reminded that there are people out there who seem totally incapable of seeing the good and vomit the bad. No matter what we do, we’ll never measure up to their levels of satisfaction to where they will ever see us in a brighter light.
 
Often we are faced with those who feel the compulsion to be mean and nasty. And they do so without regard of others.
 
Yes, it does hurt. And it hurts a lot.
 
And on the flip side of the topic, there those of us who always see the train at the end of the tunnel, rather than the rewarding light. We are never happy when we find that others are happier than we. And we allow it to bother us. When that happens- WE are the ones who become the mental punishers of others. Not because they deserve it, but because of our own petty insecurities that keeps us stuck in the quicksand of brutal and insufferable gloom.
 
I grew up hearing “treat others as you would want them to treat you”. A lot of the times, that just never happens. Whether we are the ones being attacked or we are on the other side, attacking other people.
 
Of course we want to be treated with kindness and love. But often… do we treat others with the same respect? There are those times in which I feel we need to stop and reflect within our own hearts and ask that question. If we are experiencing misery when other people are experiencing joy.. don’t we owe it to ourselves to ponder that question inwardly??
 
Funny how this pendulum swings so wide.
 
If we fight our urges to keep the bitterness and nasty away from those who are sharing with us a moment of their personal triumph and joy then perhaps we just might receive it in return when it is our turn to bask the glory.
 
Being shot down by those with whom we share our triumphs and personal victories always catch us off guard.
 
It is a horrible feeling to drop out of the sky like that because of someone’s response or reply or feedback.
 
There’s no real cure for it. We can’t avoid or change how other people may view things, but we CAN control how we are interacting with others.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 

When the summer heat gets this bad and you start to believe that it is going to melt your body into a nice puddle, one must find their own diversion and fun.

I took the liberty to order some food to be delivered via the Internet.

Twenty-one minutes after I completed my order online, they called me. Apparently a little lost, so I gave them the right directions to get to where I am.

When the driver showed up, I grabbed my wallet, snickering to myself and trying to hold it together.

I picked on the delivery driver in the WORST way. When he arrived at my door, I had a bit of fun with him.

I did not speak to him in English. Instead, I spoke to him TOTALLY IN FRENCH!!

It was not all that difficult. It was not the kind of practical joke that would take years and years of studying another language. At first, it was mainly me answering questions with “YES”… or in this case, “oui!”.

Then when I told him in French that I was really hungry and thank you, the poor guy stared at me as if I was about to cut off his head with the Sword of Solomon. It scared him half to death.

I signed the credit card receipt and signed it, writing in very large numbers that there was nothing to be added for gratuity. I could see the poor frightened squirrel of a man just want to disappear.

But in the end I gave him a cash tip of about 27% of the total bill.

I never once broke character. I even had French music playing when he arrived. He should have looked around and seen the things that were all in English.

It doesn’t end there though.

Almost an hour later, the store calls me. I answered the telephone in English. They asked for my name and if I had actually ordered food for delivery. When I told them that I had, and they had already delivered it, the manager of the store says to me, “Okay sir. Sorry to bother you. We just wanted to make sure that we had the right delivery to you, and not some crazy French man in a wheelchair.”

I did all that I could do to bite down hard on my lip and just go on like I did not know what he was talking about. I think though that the manager wasn’t too thrilled at the whole idea. I could hear the deliver guy in the background cussing me out and everything.

A crazy French man, eh??

Hilarious!!!!

Oh well. I might order from them again. It was just too much temptation not to have a little fun on this very warm July evening.

 

I probably should not be paying this much attention to the situation, and rather thanking the person for not taking their criticisms on a public forum. But I think it can be an interesting subject on how we handle criticism.

I was recently told by someone that they hated.. rather they LOATHED a few things that I had selected for posting. They were just not that into it at all. They were however, rather gracious enough to explain what they did not like about to me, but privately.

Needless to say that I was shocked. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. It was like they were taking their words and just kicking me straight in the junk with it and had no worries about consequences.

I read over it several times, trying to see their side of things. Some of it made sense, I could see how they just wouldn’t care for it at all.

I think though it was not their criticism that got to me, it was HOW they were criticizing. Their words were just about as insulting as can be. I kept trying to tell myself that I needed to be grateful for their negative feedback and move on. After all, one is not going to be able to please the entire world. “To each, their own.” Clearly, that which I had posted was not their cup of tea.

Naturally they were quite vocal on their opinion on how I could have made each posting that much better. With each paragraph that I read of their so-called “corrections”, I started to hate the term “constructive criticisms”, believing that it is just a way to soften the blow to someone who disagrees with another person.

All in all, they felt that it was “okay” to go ahead and give names of people, places, and things. That I did not have to be so vague. They believed that if I am speaking of a certain individual, I should just the flood gates open and give all detail involved with what I am posting about, so that my point of it all becomes more clear.

That simply just isn’t me. It is not who I am. I write whatever comes to me in that particular moment in time and just go with it. I do not want others to feel that sense of being “threatened” because their name and situation has been posted on the Internet. After all, is it really the business of the world to know that I think that Sally is the worst driver in the world and I cannot stand having to ask her for transportation whenever I am needing to go somewhere? No!!!

Is it really the business of the world that I went to Tokyo two summers ago and got wild and crazy with a girl named “Asuki”? What, are you kidding me?!?

And honestly, is it really the business of the world that I am going to go to New England for a wedding to witness a friend get married to a girl named Michelle twenty-two years his junior? Absolutely not.

I do not post these things–not because I fear the backlash from these individuals, but rather I choose to hold their privacy in respect. Trust me, if I ever had feared personal backlash for mentioning someone or their situation, it has not and will not appear here, ever.

So then, how in the world do we deal with criticisms, in general??

I do not believe personally, that there is right and wrong way. I do believe that with every piece of criticism, whether positive or negative, there’s something to be learned about your audience, and about yourself.

This blog obviously has taken a wild turn since I started it several months ago. The subject matter of each and every post doesn’t fit any pattern at all. So I have to stop and think, “What is it that I want to do with this blog?”. I will give my hypothetical answer to this question in another post.

Yet with the changes that it has gone through, I would have to say that I am still fine with it all and very much pleased with how it has been coming along. I’ve had many people comment on several different posts in several different ways. A majority of them in a positive light. But others, not so positive.

For myself, which is the only person for whom I can speak… whenever there is negative criticism, I stand back and try to figure out just what it was, that the person didn’t like about whatever it was that I had done. If it comes to be that they have shown me a different light where something should be changed, that it would benefit me then its all for the good and good should be taken out of the negative. If it just comes to be that the person who sent the negative criticism was just being mean, I must be able to identify that and dust them off and move on. That particular audience is not the kind of people in which I need to target.

But I will say this: I have a great number of people who are very, very supportive of me and what I do. They might not agree 100% of the time with what I say or do, but they stick by me no matter what. The difference is, is that they just don’t come up to me and say, “Ohh man, that sucked!”, then walk away OR try to change who I am.

I do not receive a lot of “negative criticism” too much. So when it comes, I’m never really all that prepared for it. And that is kind of what happened.

Therefore, I’ve taken into consideration their words and will be dusting them off because all it was (in my opinion)… was them trying to change who I am and how I write. It is too bad that they didn’t like it. I guess all I can say is that I am sorry that they didn’t like it. But is it necessary? Probably not. With how they worded things, I seriously doubt that they will be back again.

For those of you who have made it this far… I thank you and appreciate you. Every comment left, whether private or public, means a great deal to me. Your feedback is always genuinely considered. I think that it helps mold this blog to be better, as well as knowing myself better.

To those who do not like this blog: I wish you the best of luck in finding something that suits your needs more somewhere in the future.