One Less Stalker On The Streets

“I do not stalk my crush. I simply gather information for specific purposes.” – Unknown

Meet my front door as I found it Sunday morning after returning from my trip to Houston over the weekend.

When I walked inside I instinctively called the police on my cell phone and didn’t touch anything until they got here.

Evidence was picked up and gathered and it led to an arrest of a woman who goes by the name of Jane or Janeece if you catch her on a good day.

This is a woman who apparently does not live that far away from me geographically speaking.

She had found out my name based on the amount of comments left on this blog in various posts. She had taken the time to read through most of them (if not all of them) to figure out who I was. She found me on Twitter. She found me on Facebook. And then the scariest thing of all is that she found out where I lived. Or she thought she did, I never confirmed anything.

I did tell her that I don’t invite strangers into my home. So she wanted to meet me in person because I was just the most awesome guy on the planet.

Well yeah of course, but no you are not coming into my home. Neither am I going to agree to meet with you somewhere when you are telling me that you wanting terribly to have my children. 

You go into the crazy pile and labelled a “stalker.”

What else did you expect?!?!?!?!??????

So she insisted on setting up a date for us to meet in person. She went on and on and on about how great this blog is and how helpful it is for people, if they would only read it.

But the whole having my baby bit was too much.

I told her no. Emphatically no.

She asked why and I told her that I was going to Houston for a few days and I wouldn’t be here even if I wanted to meet her.

BIG MISTAKE on my part.

Nothing was broken. Nothing was stolen. Nothing was out of place. But plenty of evidence left behind to tell me that she was here, short of writing it on the walls.

She was arrested and now there will be charges filed. And there’s one less stalker left on the streets.

I suppose that I should be a lot more freaked out about this than I really am. Right now I am more focused on the fact that I had the courage to stand up to this woman and face her down and have her put in her place, which is jail. And perhaps one day I will be. But for now, there’s now one less crazy woman that I have to deal with for a while.

Never underestimate me. Several people have. And look where it got them…………..

Physically I am fine. So those who are reading this that know me personally: Fear not. I am okay.

 

Internet Security

“Never think you’ve seen the last of anything.”~ Eudora Welty.

Well, let’s face it. We should probably add this phrase to the list of oxymorons. Is there such thing as Internet security?

In some cases yes, there is. But most cases, no there is not.

Probably the number one thing we overlook as far as having our security online is the infinite ways of mass communication. Sharing sites, social networking sites. Even though you are told that you are secured- you really are not.

I am not referring to some high-tech illegal hacking ring somewhere thousands of miles away. I am talking about right here at home, the neighboring state, even in the other room.

Confused yet?

The information that we pour out into the Internet via e-mails, message boards, social networking sites, and other ways of mass communication drops that curtain of security and allows others to come into our lives. Even though we are not embarking on a journey to pass out our credit card information, we are sharing with others the OTHER kinds of information that sometimes we feel is safe.

After all, you would never had known I was wearing underwear with holes in it, if I had not told you so. Right? And no, I am not going to turn on any camera and prove it either! (Freaking perverts.)

These social networking sites are the worst. This is my main point. It allows us to say whatever we want to say, knowing that others are going to see it and read it. On a few rare occurences, they do strike back at us.

Photographs being uploaded of us soooooooo drunk the weekend before that now we are embarrassed that it ever happened. Or even some random rant that we scream at the top of our lungs about something, only to find out that we were wrong in the first place. Its out there and its there for forever.

The best thing for us to do is to not say anything. That is, if you are looking for absolute total security. But then again if that is the case, what are you doing on the Internet??

Some people WANT to be seen and heard because they have something to say. And I will say, that’s a good thing. Even I can come up with a gem of a statement a time or two, sprinkled here and there.

Those who have something to share, usually do. Its those who say things just for the sake of being seen. Those are the people who end up getting burned because they opened up their flood gates and allowed all of this information that was personal about them to become known and exposed.

And of course even for those who have decent commentary and important issues to talk about, their words get twisted because of the lack of sincerity that is taken when read. Including the absence of vocal inflection. We cannot tell just how serious a person is about something because we cannot HEAR whether they are shouting from the mountain tops or just casually speaking up.

It happened to me as of recently. One comment that was “heard around the world” and back again to the point where I had heard being said to me. Unfortunately when it was repeated back to me, the person who told me did not realize it was I who had started that comment.

Always think twice when using the Internet for communication. Don’t be so shy to edit yourself, and for crying out loud… proofread yourself!!!! Nothing says “boring” more than a message that is filled with errors. And seriously though, if you are unsure about something that you have written then don’t send it. If you have any uncertainty about whether or not you should be talking about it then chances are you probably shouldn’t be.

 

Ties, ties, everywhere there’s ties

I have been there for my friends for as long as I can remember. But now with the Internet and social networking sites, there’s the wide range of possibilities to meet new people and create even more friends and colleagues.

And with that goes the responsibility of having to put up with other people’s days when things are not going so well. Life isn’t always a peach, so when it is the pits- that becomes the true test of whether or not your friendship with that person is true and loyal.

Ever since my first days of being online, I’ve always been there for my friends and colleagues when they have been having it rough. I allowed them to vent, cry, cuss someone else out behind their backs, and do whatever it took to make sure that by the end of all of it, they felt better. I would even be so bold as to maybe offering help and advice at times when they asked for it.

I have fooled around with the notion that I have become some what of an online psychologist. I’m that shoulder to cry on, that ear that will listen. Clearly I say this jokingly as I am not a licensed psychologist.

I have sat through many long conversations online where I have been told that they were in tears, and just needed someone to listen. Yeah, I’m “that guy”. I could probably log in enough hours to have my own little corner of the world and sit by a table with a sign over my head that says, “5¢ please.”

As the years have gone by, the scenario changes. But I’m still that same guy that will stop whatever I am doing and listen to someone if they are speaking to me. Especially if they feel that they are in some kind of crisis or if they feel that they are just going to explode inside.

If any of you have ever watched Dr. Phil on television, then you know where I get the new catch phrase, “I wear the tie.” Yep, that’s me! I am the one that wears the tie. A few people realize this. They laugh and think its cute. But they also understand that I am actually going to be there for them. Most others do not. And this is what I am telling you. I am there for you, and I always will be there for you.

A few people have taken the opportunity to have me listen to them. Others, have not. There are times though that those who do not take that chance, I sometimes wished that they would. But its all a matter of personal choice. I’m never going to force someone to talk to me. Especially during stressful and difficult times.

I have been burned a few times. This is true. I have given my full attention in the past to people and all that they ever did was use me for their chance to just have themselves talk. They weren’t seeking any kind of personal relief from their woes, just personal satisfaction from the thought that someone is finally going to listen to them, and all they do is talk to hear themselves talk.

With the good, always will come the bad. That’s just life in a nutshell.

I received a text message this morning around 1:30 AM. Someone who I had earlier in the day given a text message to, and they were finally able to get around to answering me back. Their day was so bad that it got stressful and confusing as well as distracting and so therefore, that’s what happened. The response came, but it came late.

So I got out of bed and got online and had them tell me what was going on, and explain why it was so late for them to get back to me.

I took a very brutal beating for nearly an hour as they let their frustrations go. But in the end, I had them laughing. They left and I went back to bed. And that was that.

I was not in the direct line of fire from their frustration, but they were able to just get it off their chest. I was glad to have been there for support.

I take these things seriously. Because I know that I too, sometimes need a shoulder to cry on. Does the reciprocation happen as often as I deal with it? No. So what though?

I will literally get out of bed and talk with someone on the phone, online, or in person if they are in need. Doors have been open 24/7 for over 10 years now. And I don’t suppose that’s going to change in the future because that’s the friend that I am.

People have needs. No matter how shallow or great. Its up to the true test of courage as to whether or not you are able to take the good with the bad OR if you’re the kind of person that will only take the good and remove yourself from the bad, trying to avoid it. Just ask yourself: “Wouldn’t I want them to be there for you?”.

I’m not saying let them walk all over you either. You should know the difference between a cry on your shoulder and someone just out for attention. But a friend in need should have friends, indeed.