The Best Ever

“A compliment is something like a kiss through a veil.”~Victor Hugo

This really happened over on the blog from Author Jodi Ambrose:

http://jodiambroseblog.com/2014/01/27/what-the-shit-is-this/

I blew up and unleashed hell and couldn’t control myself.

Some say I was channeling the spirits of the might and the foul. I honestly don’t know what was going on. I just know that I was infuriated, and sympathetic to the lovely Jodi’s situation. I grew up with Cracker Jack, and the prize was the whole point of buying the stupid stuff. And now this?????

There was more to the exchange between myself and Jodi, but I put together the most important parts. And then came the comment at the bottom.

THAT HAS GOT TO BE THE BEST COMPLIMENT I HAVE EVER RECEIVED IN MY LIFE!!!!!! 

And I had failed to see it until today. Yet: message received.

I’ve heard of people spraying drinkable liquids through their nose because they were drinking and laughing at the same time. I never have been told that my brand of commentary would be the cause of it.

That’s just a pretty darn good feeling right there.

 

 

No Thank You

“There are no regrets in life, just lessons.”~ Jennifer Aniston

Its only the third day of November and already I am just shaking my head.

If you are on Facebook or have been in the past few years, you know about this activity in which every day in the month of November you post about something that you are thankful for.

That’s it. One day, one thing.

It seemed harmless and innocent from the first time that I learned about it. And now its becoming a bore and something that is so predictable.

Unfortunately you will find those who are active in this idea, but they tend to forget for a number of days to post what they are thankful for. I honestly think that for a few, its not possible for them to come up with thirty different things. I laugh each and every time when I see that by the middle of the month, someone has given thanks for something that they posted that they were already thankful for. They go into a repetition that is just too laughable.

These things in which people are thankful for become so cluttering, especially when they have simply forgotten for a few days and then they unload in a post of many things at once.

I know that November is the month in which people who live in the United States spend one day of Thanksgiving. And this activity on Facebook was probably started by someone who lives in the United States.

But why is it that people are so in tuned for many things that they are thankful for in the month of November? Is it because of the American holiday of Thanksgiving which makes this activity come into play? My point is why can’t there be a sharing of things in which we are thankful for THROUGHOUT THE ENTIRE YEAR?? Why is it just focused in on the month of November.

So yeah, in this year of 2012 I have seen some people tackle it. But they didn’t even bother to start off on the right foot. Yesterday being the second day of November, people who engaged in this were double posting what they were thankful for.

It may or may not be interesting to watch to see just how long it takes for people to repeat themselves for their thankful posts, whether accidental, forgetful, or whatever. It usually happens after the 16th or 17th of the month before someone goofs up and repeats themselves.

And this is never to say that I am not thankful for anything. I think that if you have been paying attention to this blog for any length of time, you know how appreciative and thankful I am for a lot of things. I just don’t think its necessary to narcissistically go on and on on a daily basis throughout one month of the year.

Rant over.

 

 

A Rant For Father’s Day

Today is Father’s Day in the USA. 

So HAPPY FATHER’S DAY to all those men who are fathers.

And with that said, here comes a rant!

All throughout the day, I had seen many posts on Facebook, talking about today being for “mothers who do double duty” or “mothers who have to take on the roles of both parents”. This disturbed me greatly.

These kinds of posts were on the verge of being so influential to take away from the genuine meaning and celebration of Father’s Day.

Now, I understand that in today’s society there are a lot of mothers in the world who are single parents. Divorce, separation, and other causes for the father to be absent from a child. Including those who are deadbeats and scum of the earth who don’t even deserve their children. HOWEVER, that doesn’t give any right or meaning to cheapen the holiday set aside for fatherhood.

There is already a holiday set aside for celebrating motherhood. In the USA, that comes in May. And that holiday came to the USA many, many years before there was a Father’s Day, which comes in June.

So the June holiday is not… I repeat, NOT … “Mothers Day II”. This also would include any false notion that Mother’s Day is a more important holiday than Father’s Day. After all, there ARE a few “deadbeat mothers” out there in the world too!

And of those men who are not in their children’s lives, it doesn’t mean that they are any less of a father or parent. Even if they never spend a single second in their child’s lifetime. Even with today’s technology in 2012, it still takes Two to Tango.  So it is my opinion that these kinds of post take AWAY from the importance of celebrating fatherhood, and it rips apart the joy that men who are fathers,  can feel. Those being the men who ARE there for their children 24/7.

As I read from an author friend of mine:  “It’s one 24-hour period. Get over it”.

 

 

Rant Responsibly

“My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and rave, and at the sound of the bell, simmer down and go about business as usual.”~ Phyllis Diller

So one of my best friends just called me and good grief she was pissed!! (Word to the wise: NEVER piss off a redhead.)

She informed me as to why she was so angry and then told me about how she felt about the situation. I sat there practically silent and waited for her to either just hang up or announce that she was done ranting and venting.

By the time she hung up the phone, she thanked me for allowing her to do that. She’s fine now and said she felt better.

And if anyone knows me, they know that I am the kind of person that is going to allow her and just about anyone else to get things off of their chest, particularly if they are close to me as the person is in this case. So I had no problem with it, yet I was smiling at the end when she thanked me. Perhaps a rare occurence when people rant and vent to me about whatever.

It got me to thinking about something. There’s a lot of ranting and venting that goes on in this day and age. And a lot of it is really not handled in the best of ways. I think that a lot of the times people just bitch and moan and scream all that they want, and that they think its okay because all they are doing is venting. There’s a difference between flying off at the mouth and getting things off your chest.

There is or at least there should be an unspoken ideal that ranting should be done responsibly. Both for the person who is talking, and for the person who is supposed to be listening.

There is nothing wrong with a rant. There is nothing wrong with getting things off your chest. However, if the person who is doing the ranting just goes on and on and on and on without any regard for the person who is listening, then what are they doing, really?? Basically nine times out of ten, they are just talking and screaming only to hear themselves speak. And that’s where the wrongful doing comes into effect.

If something is bothering you, and you know you have someone that will listen to you and you trust them… it is okay to go to them. It is okay to get things out in the clear and search for some kind of peace in a moment of turmoil. But it turns into something bad and NOT okay when you just do it … only to do it and whenever you want to do it. That is what is called “taking advantage of someone”.

Even though in that exact moment where you are letting loose, have some compassion towards others. If you abuse your friends, you will surely lose them in the end. They will scatter like the breeze because they have reached their limitations to what they can handle from all of your screaming.

There is a line. Make sure that you know where it is.

And it also goes for those who are listening. We do listen because we care. We do listen because we want to be able to be there for those whom we care about. So when it is our turn to listen, we need to do so with great intent on hearing everything that is being said, without blowing it off. Believing that whatever it is that they are saying to us is not important would be a mistake because it obviously is for them. Listeners too, must have compassion. We must realize that in that moment, they are not “okay”, and you clearly would want them to be okay in the end. Do not take them for granted.

Sometimes it will be a case of the listener having the opportunity to provide feedback or advice, other times it will just be the case of being there and shutting up. A lot of the times, those who are listening don’t have to say anything because the person who is ranting is already comforted by that fact that you are there and listening. And their battles are already half over.

In my own opinion, I feel it necessary to provide feedback and advice/suggestions. Particularly in cases that are more detailed. If it is just a quick growl and then you are feeling better, then perhaps feedback is not called for. But for those times when a rant or a vent becomes “a therapeutic session”, then yes: I will feel obliged to offer my feedback and suggestions for you. Whether you follow the advice that I give (knowing that I am not a professional), is up to you. But if you don’t- and things get worse because you don’t, then you don’t have much of a leg to stand on to come back and complain some more.

But as I said, not all of the time will feedback be warranted.

Treat them with kindness. Again, with compassion.

I do receive a lot of people who rant when they speak to me. It is because they have been told by me that it is okay for them to do so. Which has been my choice. In fact to those people that are within my inner circle, I encourage it.

No, there are not a lot of times where I am able to rant and vent when I would like to. Is it fair? Probably not. But that’s just the way it is. These people who are close to me, know its okay to go on ranting and rambling. And they also know that as long as they feel better when they are done, then I’m okay with it.

I’ve always been there for friends and loved ones and I am sure that I always will be. And who knows, perhaps there will come a time when they will reciprocate. But currently, I haven’t much to rant to them about personally. It seems a bit better at the moment for me to listen, rather than to speak.

So please rant responsibly. Know that it takes two. And both individuals that are involved, are humans with feelings and emotions. Don’t trample them by taking advantage or just up and dismissing them.