Disturbed By A Text Message

“Point me out the happy man and I will point you out either egotism, selfishness, evil – or else an absolute ignorance.”~ Graham Greene

I was sitting there one evening in the passenger seat of someone’s vehicle, very frequently looking down at my cell phone and responding to text messages that were coming in faster than I could respond, based on the fact that an event was unfolding before me as I sat there in the darkness looking out at a back door of a club. My only goal was to “watch the car” as they had put it. The doors were all locked, the keys were in the ignition still and I was jamming out to music of my choice while I waited.

Very long moments had gone by before I was startled by a pounding on the window from the driver to let them back inside of the vehicle.

From that moment on until the end of the evening, I was chewed out that I “was not doing what I was told to do.” Instead my nose was uncharacteristically buried in my cell phone.

I explained I was getting frequent updates on a situation that they knew about. And that I kept looking up from time to time and saw nothing to be alarmed over. Nothing “bad” ever happened to the vehicle. I was able to “watch the car” without having to put eyeballs on it 100% of the time.

Then there’s this piece of nuggetry:

http://loudwire.com/disturbed-david-draiman-texting-audience-member-dallas/

http://www.blabbermouth.net/news/disturbed-frontman-calls-out-fan-for-texting-during-concert-are-we-that-boring/

I’ll give you a minute.

Before I go on, I will say this: the law of averages is most likely on Draiman’s side. What he said was in fact true. It is rude. However, for those of us who weren’t there… those of us who aren’t this person that he so heroically called out, we honestly don’t know what exactly was going on. All we know is what we get from Draiman’s side of things that is muddled in frustration.

I’ve lost count how many times I’ve been in conversation with someone and at some point during that conversation, their attention went immediately and straight to their phone. And yes, that is rude.

But this woman, whomever she is that Draiman bawled out, was asked (more or less) what she was doing that was more important. The problem is, is that in these situations, audience members are NEVER allowed the chance to respond in order to defend themselves and/or their actions. By the time the obvious rhetorical question came out of his mouth, the entire audience reacted against her and therefore she was unable to answer or respond back.

This woman either had her own emergency happening at the exact time she was there to enjoy the show. Or perhaps she was giving directions for more fans to arrive. It could have been any number of things that was going on.

My mother and my grandmother both taught me when I was young that if someone is doing something that you don’t like – don’t look at them. Maybe Draiman should’ve heeded those words as there were certainly other people to concentrate upon rather than one woman who had her face buried into a cell phone.

One CAN enjoy music without using their eyes. However a concert is supposed to be both audibly and visually stimulating. At least in my experiences, they are.

Like I said, the averages are on Draiman’s side. This woman could have simply been rude as he proclaimed. But we don’t know that for sure. We don’t know what she was doing. And the sad thing is, is that we will never know! Not unless this woman comes out publicly to defend herself. And I have doubts that she will.

And these things (no matter how rude we find them) are going to happen.

So dear David Draiman,

Welcome to the age of the Internet!

Get used to it.

Cancel the Cancellation

“Do not just look at your boyfriend as just a boyfriend. Look at him as a friend, too.”~ Vanessa Hudgens

I do not honestly recall how long ago this news story was, but there was a man who had secretly recorded his telephone conversation with big time internet provider AOL, and he recorded the miserable conversation that he had to endure when AOL had realized that the purpose of his call was to CANCEL his services with them.

I don’t remember just how long he was connected with them but it was at least twenty minutes to a half an hour.

The longer it took, the angrier he became. Eventually, he was screaming and shouting and everything else in between before AOL finally bid him adieu and he was able to hang up satisfied.

Just as this man had suffered because he wanted to cancel, so did I recently with another business.

My experiences are finding that most if not all online dating websites are in reality, all the same.

They operate in the same manner and they attract the same clientele day in and day out. Just because you’ve decided to leave one dating site for another doesn’t mean that the quality of those people are going to honestly change.

This morning, I was alerted to the fact that someone had sent me a personal message through one of these online dating services. I haven’t been to it in such a long time. So long of a time, that it took nearly an hour to remember what the heck my password was to sign in to be able to read whatever message was waiting on me.

As I opened up the website, I didn’t even bother to really look to see who had contacted me. I went straight to the message.

“I keep seeing your name on other dating sites. Man, you must be lonely and desperate!”

That was it. That was the all-important message. And it was very rude, in my opinion. 

I decided to go and check out this woman’s profile while the fires in my mind steadily began to burn.

The “About Me” section was very aptly named and filled out. Whomever this 24 year old woman was… the entire profile, including the “About Me” section, was about HER, HER, HER… and HER.

But then she provided links in her “General Info” section. Links to about a dozen and a half OTHER online dating websites and was apparently her personal profile.

And “I” am the desperate and lonely one??

So I came to the decision to cancel. Not because of the 24 year old woman but because I simply never really use the website for what it is there for. Seriously though: an hour trying to remember what the password was. That is speaking in volumes.

And that’s where the insanity started. I attempted to simply cancel the account online. But then “A survey” came in the form of a pop-up and would not go away until I had filled it out. And this took several minutes to go through, as they were questioning what was wrong and why I was making the decision to leave their site. 

Just about the time that I thought that I was done, I was put through the process of chatting with one of their representatives in a quick chat log box that popped up in the corner of the screen. And it was a very persistent bugger. I clicked OUT of it. And then I would receive an error message and a new one would come up.

I probably should have went for the power cord at the back of my computer at this point, but it didn’t come to mind until much later. Instead my mind went through questioning whether or not I contracted a computer virus through all of this garbage.

More time wasted chatting with that person, that which I assume was really a bot.

And then I just clicked off the browser entirely. Within moments, the telephone rang and it was someone representing the dating site claiming that “we had a lost connection and so we looked up your personal information to be able to speak with you.”

Wow… privacy violations, anyone?!?!?!!?????

I felt like that guy who had to deal with AOL all of a sudden. But I didn’t lose my cool like he had, I stuck to my guns and only honestly answered about six questions and anything else that was asked, I told them to refer to my previous remarks.

For future reference to anyone wanting to cancel their online dating accounts and have to go to through with this: THEY DON’T LIKE THAT!!!! I am guessing their attention spans are not that great. I am only speculating though.

So a grand total of 3+ hours to get this thing cancelled. Starting the clock from the time I read that rude message by that 24 year old to the time where I felt that the job was done. 4 hours if you count the hour wasted trying to remember what in the world the password was to get into the website to begin with.

Ahh, life. You are something else!!!

Some Language Remains Offensive Even Today

“Arrogance on the part of the meritorious is even more offensive to us than the arrogance of those without merit: for merit itself is offensive.“~Friedrich Nietzsche

Let me explain before people start freaking out about the image here and I will show you how this relates to this post. This blog post is meant specifically and ONLY for the release of my frustration from earlier.

So before you go rushing off to “report” me, just hear me out and let me take this moment to let loose of my tense frustrations.

If you have kept up with this blog since or near the beginning, you’ll remember one of my neighbors that I affectionately have nicknamed “The Prophet.” I don’t remember exactly what started it. I just know that it STUCK!

The Prophet seems to think that everything is owed to her on a silver and gold plate, with diamonds and pearls. And that there is nobody on the planet that she waits for.  A former police officer of over 30 years, and a really big ego and sense of entitlement. Its horrible. I mean, ever since she moved in she burned down every bridge there was between herself and any human being who lived here.

Today was no different. But I had blocked her from getting into the apartment manager’s office this morning as he JUST walked in the door and she was hot on his heels. Hell, let the man get comfy and in the zone before people start grating at him.

So she walked away, proclaiming that she was next in line. But then proceeded to walk OUT the back door of the community room and office. I spoke my peace to the manager and then left. I went into the community room for more morning coffee and then some time later on, The Prophet came back into the building and she came after me.

After being caught in a corner, she began to whine and complain about someone else who lives here. Someone else who was also in the room. So she began to whisper.

She began to bitch and moan about the woman we affectionately named “The Constable” who is 45 years old but has the literal mind of a nine year old child, or younger. Nothing she can do about it either.

She comes into our community room every morning and makes the coffee. She takes out the trash went the cans get full. She displays food whenever it is being offered to the residents. And she’s always cleaning up the room as much as possible without getting in the way of the job of our maintenance man.

The Prophet however came to me and was snarling about The Constable and how she acts … (and here’s the offensive quote)…… “Like some goddamned Community Room Nazi.”

Wha…………. WOW!!!!

Picking on a mentally disabled woman for wanting to help. For volunteering her days to help make things nicer for everyone day after day after day. And you’re pissed because every time you come into the community room, you are seeing her either handling food or drink or in the kitchen without failure. This is coming from a woman who claims to have so much immune system problems that a speck of sunshine could kill her. Which is a gross exaggeration, but you get the point.

The Prophet is the one that no longer has friends with ANY of our 65+ residents who live here. NONE of them left!!! She is more tolerated over anything else. And without friends, you have nothing better to do but to tear people down. People who cannot defend themselves. People who have NO IDEA what they are doing half of the time due to some disability. 

And you compare this woman to a Nazi?

What in the world is wrong with you?!?!? You aren’t even old enough to remember that time period where they ruled across Europe. You’re probably not even really old enough to live here, by the age standard but have enough physical disability to qualify.

It was the most offensive thing I had ever heard with my very own ears in a very long time. And again, it was local. I could NOT believe it. Absolute shame on this woman!!! Shame be upon The Prophet. Now I’m in the corner of the Constable because she has no idea that it was said, and it shouldn’t have been said about her or anyone for that matter to begin with.

Disgusting!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

A Thanksgiving Only For One: Flying The Enemy Skies

“The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.”~ Douglas Adams

So I received this just in the nickname of time from LISAFAYECHARDONNAY.

This should have you crying and in stitches. But you have to read the entire article.

Enjoy:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/11/29/annoying-airplane-passenger_n_4360667.html

Fight Of The Fanatic

“It’s cool to meet your idols. It’s a good opportunity to travel. Those kinds of things are good.”~ Meg White

Idols. We all have them. Sometimes, they change throughout our lifetime for one reason or another. But there’s always someone that we are looking up to in our lives no matter if that person changes at one point or not.

We admire them. We think about them a lot. We daydream constantly and about what it would be like to maybe one day meet them.

And for many of us, that dream will come true. But not all of us will. I have met a number of people considered “famous” and a “celebrity” in years passed. From musicians to politicians and actors. The people whom I have a great admiration for are NOT the same people that I once dreamed about every night from a decade ago.

We’ll bump into someone that we’ve admired for a long time or find ourselves to take advantage of the perfect opportunity to finally come to face to face with them.

But I think that a lot of times people forget that our idols are actually human. And they even have idols of their own!!

Our lives certainly do change though when that magical moment falls upon us and we meet them for the first time ever with our very own eyes. The world becomes your taco.

The taco however won’t last forever.

And there are those times when we meet them and when the magical moment is gone, you’re left standing there reflecting upon it and realizing that there was nothing magical about it at all.

That happened to me once. I had met a musician once and an autograph was given, but the pleasant exchange of conversation wasn’t pleasant at all.

To be fair, I had met the musician based only on the fact that they were the idol of a girl that I wanted to get together with. And in thinking that if she knew that I had met her idol, it would place me at the top of her list. But in reality, it didn’t do a thing to help my cause. Instead of having the autograph made out to me in MY name, I had it made out in HER name and then I sent it to her. I didn’t even receive a word of thanks from her. Just an acknowledgement that she had received the autograph in the mail a week later.

At the end of the night I could not for the life of me figure out what was so awesome about their personality. I was aware of their musical talents as they had won Grammy Awards, but who in the world would willingly want to hang out 24 hours a day with a personality like that? Oh well.

Fighting over meeting your idol is true behavior of selfishness. They are also human like you and I.

But recently it seems to me that in the wide world of fanatics over one person, an actor or musician, that there are two groups of people within that circle. Those who have met their idol and those who have not. And I have noticed that for those who have met their idol have a sense of “holier than thou” over those who have not. And its really ugly.

The most recent example I can give you as that I read that someone had finally met their idol after 20 years of being a fan. They got to have dinner with them, took photographs, the idol signed autographs and was on their way. Pretty fancy, I’d say.

But now they are talking to other fans like they actually KNOW the person and they’ve been friends ever since the invention of sliced bread. To be honest, that kind of ego-trip is highly annoying. And all they are doing with other people who share that same idol, are pissing them off.

This was an actor, not a husband prospect, and simply just another human being that was actually beyond more than kind to have offered them to have dinner and talk. And now that person who had that wonderful opportunity is parading around with proverbially no pants and showing off.

And this week, someone else who has NOT met their idol really wants to. But they have been meeting constant resistance from that one person who thinks now that they are virtually family. And now a fight has broken out. Its scattering other fans to choose and pick sides. Two groups of people (those who have met their idol and those who have not) have splintered off into four, five, even six smaller groups of fanatics. But they have hatred and malice toward those who are not on their side.

I sit back. Watch. Stay silent. And shake my head in great disappointment. I would give them ALL the quote from Rodney King, but unfortunately those involved in this ridiculous dispute are too young to remember who Rodney King is. Which I suppose, makes me old.

But the quote still remains a vital and truthful statement and poses the great question of why cannot all of these fanatics get along with one another?

I have no problem with other people meeting their idol. And I have no problem with other people meeting those people that I admire the same as they do. But to have done so, and then get in the face of someone who hasn’t and speaking like they are the idol’s representative that the other person can’t have their dreams come true, just makes me so sad.

I understand the thrill and joy of meeting your idol. Nobody says that you cannot be overjoyed with emotions of happiness when you have met your idol. And nobody says that you cannot share freely of your experience. There is always someone willing to listen and share with you.

 

In the past month, I have been able to receive several autographs in the mail from people that I admire. Some of you will know what I am talking about, but most will not. And that’s because I’ve decided that I was not going to jump to the top of that mountain and start screaming about it. These were not people that you will find on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame, but people that I do admire… after all, I DO have other people that I admire. More than what I discuss about frequently in this blog.

What I do not understand is how that one person who has met their idol will continue to inflate their own ego to the point where they’ve become obnoxious, rude, and turned into a monster… believing that they’ve somehow entered a new world and became a member of some secret society.

The theory that I have come up with is that they are attempting to hold on that that precious memory for as long as they can. And by letting their ego loose is one way of allowing them to continue holding on to that experience to keep it alive. But I  could be all wrong about that!

So its all about egos it seems. But I swear that these fights that I have witnessed over the past six months over actors, musicians, politicians, and other idols are unnecessary and awfully mean.  

In my opinion, instead of fighting one another, we should be helping one another out.

Life is too short to be fighting with people. Especially if you have a common bond with that other person. Rather we all should be caring and kind and show respect. Be genuinely happy for those who have the “once in a lifetime” opportunity to have been able to meet their idol. And help those and hope for the best that other people who share that common respect and admiration that they too can meet their idol. It creates yet one more common bond that you will be able to share with one another.

I will say again, our idols are people too. They are human just like you and I. People just really need to learn to get along better.

Enjoy the taco if the opportunity arises. But when you are finished, don’t forget to SHARE it with others.

 

 

You’re A Douchebag!

“If it was legal to shoot all of the stupid people in the world, we would run out of bullets.”~ Dambreaker

This morning, I strolled on over to the corner store. I went up the hill and some random guy shouted at me asking if I wanted any help getting to the top of the hill.

Before I could politely decline, this very muscle-bound man came up behind me and shoved me over the top of the hill and then he kept going even when I was on level ground again.

It was like being blasted like a rocket into outer space.

Sometimes I allow people to help, sometimes I do not.

So then he wanted to know what the reasons were that I was in a wheelchair. And I told him.

His response was the worst thing that I have ever heard in my entire life!!!!

He told me that he couldn’t understand how I could live my life this way, being stuck in a wheelchair all day and night for the rest of my life.

Honestly, when I explain my disability, I do not normally expect people to have that light turn on and they fully understand what all I have to go through every day of my life. What he said next, ruined my entire day.

He honestly looked me in the face and said that he could never life the rest of his life in a wheelchair, and that he would just kill himself before he was confined to a wheelchair like that.

I was filled with shock, rage, and disbelief.

I asked him if he felt that was his solution. If people that live in wheelchairs should just kill themselves.

And then the rage and disbelief continued to grow.

He said with a straight face that he just couldn’t understand why more people don’t do it.

I told him a story about a man who was born in Austria who would eventually become the leader of a country called Germany in the 1930’s. That man also had the same solution. He called it the Final Solution.

Yes, I compared him to Adolf Hitler. Although Hitler’s rage was more focused on the Jewish and other classes of society. But he did exterminate and kill anyone who were in wheelchairs and were physically disabled as well.

Before he had time to react, I told him that he simply needed to go away and leave me alone.

I did have my 23” broken hockey stick with me. And yes, I could have chosen to smack him with it. But because of his muscle bound body, I felt that I would have lost that battle.

Now I have really heard some stupid things from people who do not understand the life that I have to live. And I’ve probably heard every little joke, insult, or remark in the book. And I’ve learned to just roll my eyes. But this one? It hurt. And it hurt a lot.

I came home. Began to cry, and ended up falling asleep for about an hour. I woke up, still angry at the guy. And I really do not wish to ever see him again.

It is like this guy’s brain wasn’t attached to his spinal cord. There’s a reason why there is a brain inside of his skull and its not to fill up the space inside. And why he chose not to use it before he opened his mouth is beyond me. 

Why should I kill myself? Why should anyone with a disability kill themselves?

And what of our nation’s veterans. Ironically those people who have fought and sacrificed their limbs so this guy can keep his freedoms to say stupid things like that?

Should they kill themselves as well because they are now in wheelchairs for defending our country?

The bottom line answer is not just no but HELL NO!

I’ve talked about thinking before you speak, and this is an excellent example of that NOT happening at all!

I have tough skin, but this time it broke through. And I really shouldn’t have to put up with that kind of immaturity and stupidity.

There’s nothing wrong with me that I should have to die. Just because I do not walk and often appear that I may be having trouble getting up hills. Good grief!!!

So this guy is a complete and total douchebag. And who knows what his deal is? Having to say something like probably just to make himself feel better?? Nobody will ever know.

But I am NOT going to throw in the towel like that. You can just screw off if you think like that. We have enough difficulty as it is, we don’t need your psychological stupidity on top of it.

 

Hero Award For January 2013

 

Michael Garcia

A Houston waiter refused to serve a customer who made a rude comment about a child in the restaurant.

Michael Garcia is a waiter at Laurenzo’s Restaurant. He said his regular customers are like family, especially 5-year-old Milo Castillo and his parents.

Milo was born with Down syndrome.

On Wednesday, Garcia said another diner moved him family away from Milo’s table and made a comment about the boy.

The family was heard to have said, “Special needs children need to be special somewhere else.”

Garcia said he then confronted the customer. Garcia’s personal feelings took over as he informed them, “I’m not going to be able to serve you.”

The man and his family left. Milo’s parents said they didn’t know about what happened until another waiter told them about it.

Castillo said she was worried that Garcia might lose his job, but the restaurant stood behind his decision.

Upon reading this article, this man has earned my respect in more than one way. Living with any disability can be difficult, both for that person and for the people that must take care of that disabled person. It is not easy. So comments like that do not belong in society. I’m glad that Garcia stood up for this child and did what he did. And he gets the Hero Award for January.

The Reign of Rude

“Because I remember, I despair. Because I remember, I have the duty to reject despair.”~Elie Wiesel

 

Ladies and gentlemen! Subscribers, followers, and readers…. here we go again!!

 

What day is it? Yep! Food Pantry Day.

 

Most of our usual suspects were there. One of the worst offenders was ironically not there. But the rest of them were.

 

One had even turned so greedy that when she helped out earlier in the morning to put everything in place after bringing it home, she came back in the afternoon and dared to try to go for a second round.

 

I’m telling you, these residents have got some SERIOUS issues!!

 

But today, we had a new player in the drama that is the avarice of Food Pantry Day. One who has been unfortunately burning her own bridges with her neighbors and other residents. I had forgotten just how much of a problem a person could have with her.

 

It is up to the social worker and her decisions on whether or not someone can go ahead and get their turn in early. Commonly, she’s been allowing those who carry heavy boxes of food in to take their turn first before the rest of the crowd. And it is just her way of saying “thank you” for all of their help and assistance.

 

I was surprised when I “showed up for duty” this afternoon that one of the offenders had helped and therefore our poor social worker was puzzled as to why she was back.

 

Playing dumb like you don’t understand English……. for the win!!!!

 

But this new player into today’s BS drama…. let’s just say that a lot of people believe that we can do without. And that’s a real sad thing to say or even believe.

 

Every time I called someone ELSE to go into the Food Pantry, there was always commentary. There was always some kind of remark about how SHE NEEDED to be next in line. And every time she was not… I got to hear about it.

 

The premise is nothing new, just the characters.

 

And then I started to get it from another resident, but I did not find their remarks as abrasive. So I felt comfortable teasing back that I had control over everything and if they kept it up, I’d never call their name.

 

So then our offender from hell just turned up the heat.

 

I finally just looked to see if I could find her name in the lottery box. And I could not. I was absolutely stunned that it was not in the box, and she’s got the nerve to crawl up and down my back??

 

Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. Over!!

 

I told the social worker the situation about how that resident’s name was not there in the box. I wondered if I should have just left her to suffer the consequences of her actions, or bring it to her attention and go from there.

 

So I pulled out all of the pieces of paper and spread them out on the table before me. Then I still could not find her name. At that point, I called her over to me.

 

I asked her, “Do you see your name anywhere?”. Then without hesitation, the woman became infuriated by the fact that the piece of paper that her had name on it was next to the box haphazardly, and was nowhere near being inside the box.

 

I simply didn’t see it there. Countless minutes of useless agitation and there she is accusing me of pulling her name out of the box so that I did not have to call her name to go into the Food Pantry. And I had done all of this on purpose to hurt her.

 

Ohhhhhhhhhhh the sore humanity of it all!!

 

So then I hear her scream, “That’s just wrong! I’M NEXT!!”.

 

Umm, no you are NOT!! I put her name back in the box and shook the demons out of it and pulled a name, that was yet again still not hers.

 

Then she asked if she was next. And I told her with a straight face that she was not. And that caused more “Oh Woe Is Me” crap. So I was so happy that she was actually (and legitimately) the next person after that to go in. Only to get rid of her.

 

I don’t play favorites and I never will. It is a different circumstance if the social worker makes a plea to send someone in ahead of the crowd, due to whatever reason. I just go by what she says.

 

Meanwhile, out in the hallway was roaming Miss “I Don’t Speak English”.. getting more and more concerned as I never called her name. I didn’t have to. She had her turn this morning when she helped out.

 

And then I would eventually “leave my post” and have the box unattended. And she went through it to see that there were no more papers in it. By that time there were only three people left and I pulled them out in no particular order and knew who was first, second, and third.

 

After that (in broken English… more like shattered), she asked me why her name was not in the box. I did my best to speak in smaller words saying that she had her turn in the morning.

 

She ignored me.

 

She then would see a resident hanging around the door of the Food Pantry and when that woman immediately strolled in, our little greedy one decided to park it there. She’s not stupid by any stretch of the imagination.

 

The real person that would be next would be invaded upon and then it was time to RING THE BELL!!!

 

Our greedy one rolled inside and words were spoken by the one whom she had transgressed against.

 

Then in an effort of wanting peace, she retreated her anger and the two left standing in line just moved out of the way and allowed her inside. She would end up coming out with just a few cans of food and maybe a couple bags of beans. Nothing major. Its not like she broke the bank or anything. Everyone gets the same thing. Unless you recall the strawberry flavored milk debacle in a previous blog post.

 

After the last two went in, I came straight home.

 

Luckily I didn’t snap. But I am sure exhausted.

 

I’m irritated by the fact that people have the guts to accuse me of doing things that I never did. I can see how maybe she might have felt that way. However, I never got the benefit of the doubt. What she saw (or thought what had happened) was automatically LAW??

 

Screw that.

 

It’s over for today, and this month. And people snicker when I call it “my time of the month”. I wonder if they actually get it or not. Because one thing is for sure, the residents here sure don’t.

 

I just wanted to come home and scream. People are most likely lucky I didn’t do that either. I’m sure the police would have been alerted.

 

UGH!!

 

 

 

 

 

Intruded And Insulted

“The psychology of a language which, in one way or another, is imposed upon one because of factors beyond one’s control, is very different from the psychology of a language which one accepts of one’s free will.”~ Edward Sapir

The other afternoon I was taking a bit of a nap. It didn’t last long as I heard someone knocking on the door. So when I got up to answer the door, a very tall man (probably about 6’4″/ 193 cm) began to introduce himself as well as intimidate with his size to push me back away from the door and find his way inside of my home.

He sat down and introduced himself as a psychologist and wanted to come by and say “hello” and allow himself to be used at my disposal for my needs. I stared at him blankly for a moment, trying to figure out how he got inside so fast and then just made himself at home like he did.

Then he mentioned that “a neighbor” was concerned about me, considering the pain and suffering I had this past January from doing what I had to do when I was assaulted. Allegedly, this neighbor was concerned about my mental health and safety and gave him a call to come by.

Well, as much as I appreciated the idea that the neighbor was thinking about me this really wasn’t anything that I had in mind on how to deal with the traumatic situation that I had gone through. Yes, perhaps a psychologist. But not one that just walks through my door and sits down and starts asking me a bunch of questions. And trust me, this gets worse and it shouldn’t have.

So I gave him all of the gruesome details about the assault. The way I had protected myself, the death, and what had happened. As I was talking about it, he began to sit on the edge of the couch as if he was watching some intense moment on television.

When I had finished he sat back and exhaled. He shook his head and with plenty of profanity, he expressed how rotten that this had happened to me and that people suck… really, really SUCK.

He said something along the lines of he was glad it was just the one time. But I informed him that I have been no stranger to assault in this area in the past few years. People wanting my wallet or whatever I had.

He was shocked to hear that there was a lot more to my past with crime than just the one time. He began to laugh and laugh and laugh. More profanity as he exclaimed with his excitement. At some point, he had to stop me from going through everything. And then his reaction and comment was totally and completely insulting in my humble opinion.

He looked me in the face and said, “Man! You are a really big shit magnet!!”. And then he continued to laugh and laugh.

Umm…

I understand that it is so wild that I have been targeted many times for people who were willing to commit criminal activities and intrude upon me, but to insult me like that was totally unprofessional, uncalled for, and rude.

So then he said that I should call him in a few weeks and he will come out again and we will come back and talk to me. This guy apparently does visits in people’s homes. And I think that could work to other people’s advantage that he would come to them. I just do not understand how he keeps his job by behaving like he does. Especially how he behaved in front of me. Almost like he was having a great time hearing the stories that I was telling him. Stories of crime and of course, pain.

What really sticks out in my mind, is the laughing. And the swearing in his thoughts that some how I am some kind of person that attracts these bad things that has happened to me in the past few years. Almost to say that it is all MY fault.

And he says he wants to help me through the process of dealing with it. Now, I am not quite sure on how he is going to do that when I am feeling smaller and smaller as he laughs at me.

Clearly this is not the best guy for the job. Not if I am going to be feeling little about things. Isn’t he supposed to empower me instead? And clearly I have a neighbor out there somewhere, of course I was not told who it was, but whomever it was: Thank you for the thought, but mind your own business!!

Getting Territorial

“A woman would run through fire and water for such a kind heart.”~William Shakespeare

So I’ve decided while this is still fresh, to share this with you. I received quite the wicked message from a man who apparently has “the lovers making of 10,000 men”. It was not in the least bit pleasant and definitely something that has been written out of rage. At first, it was offensive. But when I read it over a few times, it just got stupid and I began to find a lot of humor in it because it is so senseless, unnecessary, and above all: wrong.

I find the reason behind this message being written to me to be just as laughable. Sufficed to say, I did not reply. I did not ask questions. I simply deleted the message. But what I did do was copied it.

This message that is written by this man is involving a woman that he and I both know and associate with. For myself, it is at a social and platonic level. But evidently, this woman has somehow developed into the love of his entire life.

I will keep the names out of it. Other than that I will not edit it, however I will warn you that the language is a bit rough. It reads as follows:

Hey dude,

Who the fuck do you think you are?? Do you think you are some kind of Romeo cuz you’re not. You’re not God’s gift to women either, you fucking jerkoff!! Why don’t you just fucking roll down a hill and off of a cliff!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do you think _______ is really all that impressed with you? Do you really think she is in love with you? Boy you have another thing coming if you think you are going to get down into her panties. I have a better shot at that than you do. I am not being cocky, I am just being real. Quit sending those stupid x’s and o’s and get out of the dark ages. Go find yourself another woman cuz I can speak for her right now she don’t want you, motherfucker. Fuck off and die.

As I said, I suspect this was written in anger. I am not the kind of person that will react to confrontation. In fact, I will avoid confrontation as much as possible. Particularly with people that I do not know. This guy, I don’t know anything about personally. Just that he and I have some kind of correspondence with the same woman.

It is actually primal and natural to be territorial. Men fight other men to keep other men away from their woman. They do things to make sure that nobody even dares to take a glance in the wrong way towards the woman that they are with. It would seem as if males are more territorial than females. But females also get territorial themselves. But I could be wrong. I honestly do not know who is more territorial, male or female? I have no clue.

But in this case where this man wrote me a message, is totally ridiculous.

So let me break this down and I hope that I can show you why I think this is funny.

First and foremost, my name isn’t “dude”.

Am I Romeo? No. Romeo is a fictional character in a play from Shakespeare. The character of Romeo also kills himself in the end. I am neither fictional or suicidal.

Am I God’s gift to women? Absolutely not! If I were “God’s gift to women”, I wouldn’t be sitting at home at this hour on a Friday night!! My Facebook friends list would be at maximum, my Twitter account would have thousands and thousands of followers, and my e-mail inbox would be FULL of messages to the point where it would no longer be accepting new messages because it reached its capacity. And my phone would be ringing off the hook.  None of these things are happening.

Sending x’s and o’s the last time I looked isn’t a crime. Rather it is something that I do. It is something that makes me who I am. I am an affectionate person and if I so choose to show affection by writing “xoxo”, then that’s what I do. Apparently this bothers him too much. Well, too bad.

Am I trying to get into someone’s pants? No. The woman who this man is referencing lives thousands of miles away from me. So the actual reality is that there’s no way that I could, even if I wanted to get inside of her pants. I may find this woman to be physically attractive but that doesn’t mean I am trying to engage in congress with her.

As far as I know, this woman could already have a social life of her own that includes sexual activity. Whether she does or not, is her business and not mine. And by the same token, it really isn’t any of this guy’s business either. But something inside of him that he saw me either say or do caused him to get so crazy out of his mind with rage and jealousy, that he thought it would be best if he marked his territory over this woman who lives thousands of miles away from her as well.

What they do and what they talk about is their business. What this woman & I do and talk about is MINE.

There are so many different theories as to why this man has done what he did. Personally, I don’t care. With his message though, he just showed his immaturity. I COULD HAVE forwarded the message to the woman in which this so-called conflict has taken place, but I don’t find the worth in doing so.

I firmly believe that this whole scenario is based on something that this man did not like and instead of seeking out the truth, he decided to make up his own mind about what was going on, and decided to speak while still processing his anger. And that is something that we as humans, should never do. Talk out of anger. It is something that takes practice though. It took me a very long time to realize my emotions that were becoming out of control and ultimately speaking out of anger. I since believe that I can edit my own self a little better and not do it so much.

In my last relationship, I yelled at my ex just once during the entire length of the time that we were together. But then I quickly realized that I had done so, I apologized to her immediately, and then tried to resolve the issue that we were arguing about from a different angle or method.

To speak out of anger, causes a lot of problems. For one, a person usually ends up saying something that they did not mean in the first place. They are hurt and all that they want to do is make the other person feel their hurt. So they say things that are not true just to hurt them. However in the end, all they have done is said things that they didn’t honestly mean or believe in, and caused themselves even more pain.

This guy however wants to be “King of the mountain”. So whatever.  And if he doesn’t like that I speak to women in certain ways well then he has the problem, and not mine. It will be something that he will just have to deal with or accept.