German Speaking Woman

Dear German Speaking Woman who was on the bus over the weekend:

I have to say that the moment that I spotted you that you were quite attractive. But I didn’t really want to say anything to you because … who wants to be approached like that while sitting on a city bus?

And perhaps I was surprised by you as you were by me. But nobody can say for sure. I was not expecting you to answer your cell phone in German.

And I’m pretty damned sure that you were not expecting me to talk to you in response in German. If at all.

I honestly did not mean to startle you, if I am going to be honest. But I do speak over fifteen languages. None of which are really fluent.

I hope that you weren’t cold while riding the bus because I did see you shiver a little bit when I spoke. I’m sorry that I did not have a coat or jacket to cover you with, if you were cold.

How’s your right ankle by the way? I saw you twist it like a mofo when you rang for the bell to get the bus to stop and attempt to exit off of the bus. That really did look like it hurt.

By the way, you may want to check with your physician about other problems as well. Perhaps you could get answers as to why you became so incontinent when you stood up to run off the bus like that. You left quite the trail behind you, and the seat you were upon, it looked like a grease stain inside of an auto garage.

Any ways, I hope you are doing well and I hope to see you again soon. Perhaps I’ll try again…. this next time in English.

Auf weidersehen.

Scared To Death

“I’m obsessed with zombies. I like watching zombie movies and I read zombie books.”~ Kevin Bacon

When I heard about this story I was totally shocked and then on the other side of things I could do nothing but nod.

If it is true then it is terrible and tragic.  But since I heard about it by word of mouth then I do not know whether or not I am going to believe that it is.

As we come closer and closer to Halloween, everyone who celebrates are getting excited. And some of us are the kind of friend that will exploit the fears of other friends.

Such is the case that I heard most recently.

A group of friends were wanting to go visit a haunted house. But one of the friends had a really nasty fear. They didn’t like being scared and all of that. They didn’t watch horror films and they didn’t participate much in Halloween. The problem was that they just scare too easily.

Well the rest of the group were minus one, and they just didn’t feel right about it. They wanted to include their fear struck friend in their hijinks some how.

Rather than spending their money for admission to their favored haunted house, they decided to use the money to dress up with costumes and make-up and go scare their fearful friend at his home.

The group was described to go to the nines. They even learned how to be a zombie after hiring an instructor. So the group finally got ready with their scary outfits and had a few zombie actors tag along with them to go scare their friend.

They waited until after 11 PM at night and they came up to the house and started pounding on the front door and windows all around the house. 

Their friend was asleep when they arrived. When he heard all of the noises, he went into a panic. He reached under the bed and pulled out his loaded pistol and started screaming at the people to go away.

The zombie party continued to stay in character, until the first shots were fired through the bedroom window.

In his half-awake state, the victimized and pranked friend went ballistic and fired upon everyone who was banging against his house.

Even after the scary party realized what was going on and they fled for their lives and coming out of character, the guy charged out of his house and kept firing upon them.

It was never told whether or not anyone had died in this horrible incident. But I think it would be safe to say that someone got seriously hurt.

I’ve been searching and searching online for any story or article written about this. I have not been successful in finding anything. So, this could just be a Halloween story for fun. If that is the case… that’s messed up!!

I hope that everyone has a safe and fun Halloween, no matter how you celebrate it. Be mindful and respectful of other people, keep it clean folks.

 

 

Wheelchair Cemetary

Today, I must say farewell to my trusty friend. It truly was my companion. It took me wherever I wanted to go. I had some good times with it. But now its time to carry on without it.

My wheelchair broke this afternoon. Fortunately I was not in it when it decided to give up the ghost. It was in the process of being loaded into the back of a truck when it spun its last revolution.

It suddenly had become wobbly and so when it was set back down on the ground, parts of it had come undone and the X-frame was no longer in its capable position. Rather though one of the bars came right through the bottom of the wheelchair.

We gathered that I definitely would have fallen at the time of its collapse, and it probably would have done some very serious physical damage to my body as I sank with gravity to the ground. Some way, some how, I would have been impaled. I am just thankful that I was already inside of the truck when it happened. So, no impaling today. Vlad Țepeș must be so disappointed in his grave.

I actually laughed when I saw it in its warped state. I didn’t panic because I knew I had other older wheelchairs stored away, but after a few hours of sitting in the secondary chair, its not so funny anymore to me.

Now I am sitting in a wheelchair where the front right wheel shakes like that same old grocery cart you always seem to find at Wal-Mart. It never stops shaking!!

The one that bit the dust was in fact a newer chair. I’ve barely had it for a year, maybe a year and a half. Now its only good for spare parts. It is true what they say, “Don’t know what you got, until its gone.”

I think that it sucks because I have to find one of the older chairs now and try to get used to them and adapt to how they work. The one I am sitting in at the moment really hurts my poor little butt!

So sad today could have been. But I am fine and in good health. No injuries or anything like that.

Now if only the apartment manager will loan me a shovel so I can bury the one that died today in the yard.