Sing What Happens

“I see L.A. as a beautiful blonde with dirty underwear.”~ David Boreanaz

Never in a million years would I think that I would be writing about this subject matter.

I’ll keep it short, and I will also attempt to keep it as clean as possible as it really is NSFW.

However, floating around on Facebook today are several articles about a certain television program that is aired in Japan on certain adult cable channels. A contest called “Sing What Happens.”

Now I really don’t think something like this would EVER been  televised here in the United States of America. But it most certainly does exist in Japan in small and dark corners.

To learn more about this unusual television singing contest is a link below to an article talking about it:

Read at your own risk. [NSFW]

As for me ……. I need a life!
http://elitedaily.com/humor/sng-what-happens-jacked-off-karaoke/1002824/

Weird News Of The Month

“The world is all gates, all opportunities, strings of tension waiting to be struck.”~ Ralph Waldo Emerson

This is interesting.

I received an e-mail not that long ago from a group of strangers who apparently live in northern California/southern Oregon state region. Together they have a band.

But I’ve been secretly and yet cordially invited to join their band.

I’m told that they’ve seen video of me singing and think that I have it as a baritone voice. Which is what they are looking for.

I thought that this might have been a band in Houston, if so…  I was going to totally flip out!

But it is not.

The other thing about it is that they’ve “seen video of me singing?” WHAT?!?!?!????

I’ve not done public karaoke in a long time. I can’t think of anything that I may have done publicly where I may have been recorded and not have known it. 

They said that they would put together about $1,000 for me to get there if I wanted to join. That money would be mine to use to get there. Personally though, I don’t think its enough.

Not to live in that part of the country at least.

I don’t know anything about the band who contacted me. It is a red flag to me that they said to keep things secret. And I’ve never been to that part of the country, so I don’t know anything about what’s there for me.

The red flag made me think whether or not this was a joke or at the very least, not real.

I’ve not found anything on YouTube about this band. Nor any website or webpage.

Its disheartening. Especially to receive such an offer. 

But I’m baffled because — what in the world are they talking about that they had seen me sing that I was using my baritone register???

To my knowledge, no video of me singing or performing exists on the Internet.

I don’t know whether to reply or not. I do not know if there would be an answer back. It’s just a little freaky.

Could this be real or could it all be bullshit??

Causing Problems At Bars On Karaoke Night

“A person without a sense of humor is like a wagon without springs. It’s jolted by every pebble on the road.”~ Henry Ward Beecher 

I guess some drunk people just can’t take a joke sometimes. But I knew that eventually I was going to get into trouble some day.

Karaoke night. And the first thing that happened when I went through the front door was someone coming up to me asking if I was going to participate in singing karaoke. Of which I didn’t realize was going on.

Since I have done so in the past at that particular place, I agreed. Without skipping a beat, the person who was asking gave me a list of songs that I was banned from singing.

Banned.

Wow! Seriously? And they apparently were.

It was a list of pop songs with my name on it at the top a full page long of various songs that I have sung in the past and won their karaoke contests with in a landslide vote by bar patrons.

And now I’m banned from singing them ever again in that establishment. And one another has banned me from singing one pop song in particular. That is if I am wanting to be a part of their karaoke contests.

I never actually take their prizes. Usually its just free drinks or a free entree or whatever. And since I do not drink, I never use it. I always give it to someone else before I leave.

Okay, whatever. So this forced me to go through their “book” to find something to sing that I was comfortable with, and that I could work with in my vocal range.

I had one problem. One very huge problem. The book was full of country karaoke music.

But as I went through the book and worked towards the end, I saw something listed on a page that was familiar with me. It was written in the genre of country music too. Everyone who sang ahead of me were singing country.

So I selected the song, “Good Enough For Now” by none other than “Weird Al” Yankovic.

Since most of you have not been living under a rock, I do not have to explain who that is. But when you have a room full of people who are drinking tons of beer and enjoying country music, this selection was ripe with disaster. I just wouldn’t know it yet until I got settled on the stage.

I had a very tough act to follow. The guy who was singing before me, had brought his girlfriend up near the stage and he sang John Michael Montgomery’s version of the song, “I Swear”. To which brought her to tears and many people who watch this magical romantic moment.

How the heck am I going to dazzle a crowd in which the winner is chosen by applause and THAT kind of thing happens? There is just no beating that kind of act!!

I watched the crowd, and I selected two women that I would “sing to”. One extremely drunk, the other pretty wild, drunk, and dressed very slutty celebrating her 21st birthday. It was too easy to select the birthday girl for this rather amusing and funny gag.

I sang this song to the two women and I nearly was torn off the stage by them both. By the first for most of the song, and then by the second woman by the end of the song. Of which I might add was not a karaoke version. I had to sing along with the album version.

They should have realized that by the second line of the song, that this was all just a big joke.

One of them, I guess it might have been a husband or boyfriend was standing there with a beer rushed the stage and stuck his middle finger in my face and screaming with a resounding “Hey, fuck you buddy!!”. 

I kept singing. I moved away when I could but he would follow. But then when I turned my attention to the second girl (the birthday girl), he stopped. But then the second girl was throwing a fit and that was probably because she was embarrassed. She was just so awfully tempting to pick out because she was so loud and obnoxious and of course, drunk out of her mind.

I got yelled and screamed at for a while after I got off the stage A lot of people shouted their obscenities at me. Luckily nobody came after me and started a physical confrontation.

If you want to know why this caused such a problem, you can find the song on YouTube or you can Google search the lyrics.

The song came off of the album “Polka Party” which was released in October 1986. I thought for sure that many of these people would find the humor. I thought wrong. Maybe everyone in this crowd were born AFTER 1986? I don’t know.

I just know that if I am going to be “banned” from singing songs, and my hands are tied behind my back when everyone is doing country songs, I’m going to go at it in my own way. Which I did.

I even said during the musical solo into the microphone that it was just a joke. Nobody found it funny Except for a couple of people way in the back sitting at the bar who was laughing to themselves when they heard me singing the words to the song.

I wasn’t going to win. But then again I never planned to join the contest in the first place. I was just trying to get out of the house and have some fun and relax. This is probably no longer the place to do that any more.

I’m still trying to wrap around my mind of how they can “ban” me from singing specific songs.