When Blogging Doesn’t Go As Planned

“But I think it is always difficult to have high expectations of yourself or anyone else.”~ Uma Thurman

DEAR NEW BLOGGERS:

So you’ve had a blog for an extended period of time. And your own personal goals are not being met. Frustration has settled in for what seems to be a permanent vacation inside of your head, and is staying there rent free.

Your personal reasons as to why you began to blog in the first place are yours and yours alone. Nobody can take that away from you.

But it just seems unfair that it appears that you are not getting what you were hoping for to begin with.

I have also experienced the same frustrations and confusion over my own personal blog. I’ve had up to five different blogs at one time, and now I am down to three. Two of which are honestly seeing any kind of creativity or usage at any given time.

Three and a half years later after beginning DAMBREAKER which is the first and original blog, there’s only 125 subscribers/followers. Nearly 142,000 total views in that time, but I honestly would have thought that if  in three years or more I would have thousands of people reading, viewing, commenting, and participating. But I don’t. Not publicly at least.

Is it the content? Is it that I am not writing about the right things? Am I focused on things that are just boring?

Well, all that can be said in response to that is that there are different strokes for different folks.

I cannot count or remember how many times that I had thought about trashing the entire blog. DAMBREAKER was going to be complete and total history and I would have sat here in front of my computer fuming about how it would have been a huge waste of my time to have ever been involved in blogging in the first place.

But hold on!!! Before you go tapping away at that DELETE button you should probably consider a few things. 

This posted image is something I relate to when dealing with the so-called “success or failure” of my blog, DAMBREAKER.  The same could be related to your own blog in deciding whether or not YOUR page is succeeding or failing.

Let’s keep things simple for right now though.

#1- LIKES. There is (at least for WordPress) a “LIKE” button. We’ve all seen it on other social media websites. It works the same way on WordPress. If someone enjoys the post, they can click the “LIKE” button. Ask yourself: Have I received any of these “LIKES” to any of my posts that I’ve written on my own blog? If the answer is YES- You are successful.

#2- COMMENTS. Again, the same as social media websites there is the option for the reader to leave a comment. Some people use it for compliments to whatever it is that you have written. Others are adding their own opinions. Some still will relate to your post and will tell you about it, which allows for further discussion on the topic. Ask yourself: Have I received any comments on any of my posts? If the answer is YES- You are successful.

#3- FOLLOWERS. Ask yourself: Do I have anyone following my blog? Is there anyone that signed up to have anything that I put on my blog immediately directed into their e-mail inbox? If the answer is YES … even if the number is ONE- You are successful. It tells you that at least one person is interested in what you are writing about and want to know and read about more and more and more. And wish to keep in touch that way.

#4- PERSONAL FEEDBACK. Sometimes people do not subscribe to your blog or follow your blog. Sometimes your blog doesn’t go to someone’s e-mail inbox directly. They don’t leave you comments. They don’t click the “LIKE” button if one is available or rate your post. But they come to you in other ways and forms of communication and provide you with feedback. They either found it on their own or you have published the post publicly somewhere else and they followed the link to your blog and now they are talking about it. Good or bad- whatever it is that they have to say is evidence that they are at least reading your blog. If they are reading your blog- You are successful.

You don’t need thousands of followers with thousands of comments and thousands of people clicking “LIKE” to know that you are doing something good.

Yes it would be nice to have those things, but they are not completely necessary to have success.

As a matter of fact, I’ve come across a lot of personal feedback in which the person admitted to reading this blog and then gave their feedback in what they did like about it or how I have been such an inspiration to them which caused them to change their lives for good in some certain way. When you hear things like that ….. you know that its all worth it in the end. And sometimes that’s really all that you need.

These kinds of things are what we as bloggers should remember whenever we get down about what we are doing with our blog posts and thinking that its not doing anyone any good because there’s no “activity” and we assume its a failure. To remember this checklist is all the validation that we will ever need.

Get Out Of My Way

“Don’t be mad because I don’t care anymore. Be mad because I once did, and you were too blind to see.”

Perhaps you feel that it is too difficult. Maybe you feel that it is too much money or expensive. Maybe you think that its a waste of time and resources.

Maybe it is because you don’t like the idea and you personally don’t want me to do it. And that probably is coming from the fact that you are either jealous because it seems like to you that I have a better life than you or you want me to be as miserable as you are because it seems like to you that you have no life.

Or you think that I am not going to be successful in life and will just fail and want me to stop.

If any of you fit the above descriptions. I have a few things to say to you.

First off- GET OUT OF MY WAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It is NOT up to you to dictate what I do or don’t do in my life. I did not come out of your birth canal. And the fact that I am a grown adult. Your argument is invalid!

My successes and failures come from one person and one person only: ME!

Should I fail miserably, it is because of me. And if I succeed, it is because I had the will to try hard enough.

Keep your hands off of me and stop trying to drag me down to the ground so that I will fail. Your name is not “God” and my destiny is not in the balance because of your own opinions or actions. Again, get out of my way and let me try!

You tell me that I shouldn’t disturb people or step on their toes. YOU are the one who who has been stepping on my toes this entire time. Keeping me from accomplishing what I have been wanting to all along in the first place. Maybe it is time to step on toes and knock on doors. Because with as many times as I will be told NO (and I will be- I understand that) there will be someone who will tell me YES. Let me find those people!

If you are not going to support me, believe in me, or even let me try? Then all you will find is the back of my head as the dust begins to rise.

 

 

The Measurement Of Success

“It is not a question of whether or not I will stick my foot in my mouth at some point today, it is whether or not I will be able to make room to shove the other one in there.”~ W. Fry

This morning I was engaged in a conversation with one of my beautiful friends. She had complimented me on my success here on this blog. She was impressed at the number of views that I have received thus far in 11 months and 1 week of writing in this blog.

My response was more of : Open mouth. Insert foot. Keep going til you reach the hip.

I answered that success was relative to each individual’s idea of what it is. I said that, instead of “thank you” right away.

Collateral Damage in 3… 2… 1 ………..

I also further sank my own butt by mentioning that throughout the fall of last year, I had an increased number of views like never before. But then in mid-December, that seemed to have faded. So I haven’t been getting the higher volume of views recently as I have been. I can only imagine what I sounded like to her! I was being such a whiner!!

Geez. Why didn’t I just take the compliment? I’m always telling people: Take the compliment and run. Perhaps a taste of my own medicine would’ve been a better solution. Man down, we got a man down!!!

However, she is right. My blog IS successful!!! I am still writing in it. I didn’t give up when nothing was happening. I continued to use it for when I felt I needed to. I gave more and more blog posts on certain situations that we all deal with. And even though I’ve not really received anything in the form of tangible feedback, that doesn’t mean that it has not been successful.

So then how does one measure success?

Well, I do believe that it varies. What one person thinks is successful might not be the shared opinion of another person. It all depends on YOU!

For example: If you make $50,000 a year- are you successful? Or are you successful if you make $250,000 a year??

Are you successful if you have 10,000 collectibles of your favorite thing? Or are you successful if you have 75,000 collectibles??

When you’ve reached a point and then you look back, and you feel that you have accomplished something, that would probably be your significant detail that you are successful. Your happiness to be where you are at that new point also determines whether or not you feel that you have been successful.

One the best tools a person can have in order to achieve success, is to have goals. If you’ve reached those goals at the end, then yes.. you’ve been successful.

Your goals vary from other people’s goals. But focus on yourself and not others. Those who grant you feedback will help you along in making your goals. That way, you know whether or not you need to do any tweaking along the way.

So all in all, I actually do believe in my friend. Even though I had a lapse of couth. I’m very happy with how this blog has turned out in less than a year.

I am grateful for her feedback. And I’m sorry for being a dork.