Posts Tagged ‘taking sides’

img928

“It’s cool to meet your idols. It’s a good opportunity to travel. Those kinds of things are good.”~ Meg White

Idols. We all have them. Sometimes, they change throughout our lifetime for one reason or another. But there’s always someone that we are looking up to in our lives no matter if that person changes at one point or not.

We admire them. We think about them a lot. We daydream constantly and about what it would be like to maybe one day meet them.

And for many of us, that dream will come true. But not all of us will. I have met a number of people considered “famous” and a “celebrity” in years passed. From musicians to politicians and actors. The people whom I have a great admiration for are NOT the same people that I once dreamed about every night from a decade ago.

We’ll bump into someone that we’ve admired for a long time or find ourselves to take advantage of the perfect opportunity to finally come to face to face with them.

But I think that a lot of times people forget that our idols are actually human. And they even have idols of their own!!

Our lives certainly do change though when that magical moment falls upon us and we meet them for the first time ever with our very own eyes. The world becomes your taco.

The taco however won’t last forever.

And there are those times when we meet them and when the magical moment is gone, you’re left standing there reflecting upon it and realizing that there was nothing magical about it at all.

That happened to me once. I had met a musician once and an autograph was given, but the pleasant exchange of conversation wasn’t pleasant at all.

To be fair, I had met the musician based only on the fact that they were the idol of a girl that I wanted to get together with. And in thinking that if she knew that I had met her idol, it would place me at the top of her list. But in reality, it didn’t do a thing to help my cause. Instead of having the autograph made out to me in MY name, I had it made out in HER name and then I sent it to her. I didn’t even receive a word of thanks from her. Just an acknowledgement that she had received the autograph in the mail a week later.

At the end of the night I could not for the life of me figure out what was so awesome about their personality. I was aware of their musical talents as they had won Grammy Awards, but who in the world would willingly want to hang out 24 hours a day with a personality like that? Oh well.

fields

Fighting over meeting your idol is true behavior of selfishness. They are also human like you and I.

But recently it seems to me that in the wide world of fanatics over one person, an actor or musician, that there are two groups of people within that circle. Those who have met their idol and those who have not. And I have noticed that for those who have met their idol have a sense of “holier than thou” over those who have not. And its really ugly.

The most recent example I can give you as that I read that someone had finally met their idol after 20 years of being a fan. They got to have dinner with them, took photographs, the idol signed autographs and was on their way. Pretty fancy, I’d say.

But now they are talking to other fans like they actually KNOW the person and they’ve been friends ever since the invention of sliced bread. To be honest, that kind of ego-trip is highly annoying. And all they are doing with other people who share that same idol, are pissing them off.

This was an actor, not a husband prospect, and simply just another human being that was actually beyond more than kind to have offered them to have dinner and talk. And now that person who had that wonderful opportunity is parading around with proverbially no pants and showing off.

And this week, someone else who has NOT met their idol really wants to. But they have been meeting constant resistance from that one person who thinks now that they are virtually family. And now a fight has broken out. Its scattering other fans to choose and pick sides. Two groups of people (those who have met their idol and those who have not) have splintered off into four, five, even six smaller groups of fanatics. But they have hatred and malice toward those who are not on their side.

I sit back. Watch. Stay silent. And shake my head in great disappointment. I would give them ALL the quote from Rodney King, but unfortunately those involved in this ridiculous dispute are too young to remember who Rodney King is. Which I suppose, makes me old.

But the quote still remains a vital and truthful statement and poses the great question of why cannot all of these fanatics get along with one another?

I have no problem with other people meeting their idol. And I have no problem with other people meeting those people that I admire the same as they do. But to have done so, and then get in the face of someone who hasn’t and speaking like they are the idol’s representative that the other person can’t have their dreams come true, just makes me so sad.

I understand the thrill and joy of meeting your idol. Nobody says that you cannot be overjoyed with emotions of happiness when you have met your idol. And nobody says that you cannot share freely of your experience. There is always someone willing to listen and share with you.

 

In the past month, I have been able to receive several autographs in the mail from people that I admire. Some of you will know what I am talking about, but most will not. And that’s because I’ve decided that I was not going to jump to the top of that mountain and start screaming about it. These were not people that you will find on the Hollywood Walk Of Fame, but people that I do admire… after all, I DO have other people that I admire. More than what I discuss about frequently in this blog.

What I do not understand is how that one person who has met their idol will continue to inflate their own ego to the point where they’ve become obnoxious, rude, and turned into a monster… believing that they’ve somehow entered a new world and became a member of some secret society.

The theory that I have come up with is that they are attempting to hold on that that precious memory for as long as they can. And by letting their ego loose is one way of allowing them to continue holding on to that experience to keep it alive. But I  could be all wrong about that!

So its all about egos it seems. But I swear that these fights that I have witnessed over the past six months over actors, musicians, politicians, and other idols are unnecessary and awfully mean.  together

In my opinion, instead of fighting one another, we should be helping one another out.

Life is too short to be fighting with people. Especially if you have a common bond with that other person. Rather we all should be caring and kind and show respect. Be genuinely happy for those who have the “once in a lifetime” opportunity to have been able to meet their idol. And help those and hope for the best that other people who share that common respect and admiration that they too can meet their idol. It creates yet one more common bond that you will be able to share with one another.

I will say again, our idols are people too. They are human just like you and I. People just really need to learn to get along better.

Enjoy the taco if the opportunity arises. But when you are finished, don’t forget to SHARE it with others.

 

 

The following story is true. No details have been changed. Names are not changed to protect the innocent nor the guilty. What follows may shock you, disgust you, and quite possibly change your perception on what you thought before.

I will first start off by setting up the story by telling you that at the apartment complex in which I live, is a lovely place. I have been told by so many people who have visited here that its scenary is totally breathtaking and serene. As for myself, I enjoy living in this place.

Only the physically disabled, retired, and elderly can apply. And since I am one of the physically disabled, I qualify to live here. I have grown to know my neighbors in a delightful sense of companionship and have spent many days and weeks including myself with them in their activities which happens to be on the calendar of events.

With that said, there is one day in which I fear. Food Pantry Day. It happens once a month for three hours on one day, and a full hour on another day. The bulk of the residents come to the community room to receive their food items on the day in which time is of the majority. That’s when I receive my items as well.

But it has been something of a disaster in recent months. It was only about two years ago that I had decided to volunteer to help in any way that I could, in order to keep chaos from happening. Clearly, things have gotten better but its definitely not a case that we’re out of the woods yet. To take a quote from the movie, “The Antichrist”…. “chaos reigns.”

Our usual system had a break down, probably about four months ago it was changed. It had been getting better since I decided to try and help. It became my task to call names from a list in which each resident would sign their name and their apartment number in order to keep a more accurate count in how many people were participating in receiving items from the Food Pantry.

Food Pantry items are actually picked up from a central food bank. The community donates food items and it gets distributed to those in need. I’m not 100% sure on how our complex qualifies to receive these items, but my money is on the fact that we are a non-profit. These donated food items comes to us, and they are distributed to the residents here, for free!

Sounds pretty good, right?

I will say personally that the Food Pantry has come in very useful for me when funds are low during the month. Having that extra collection of food to get me through whatever I need to before I am able to have some money to go to the store again. I cannot complain about the Food Pantry at all. But this is just my rambling. So I digress.

It has been turmoil these last couple of years. When that sign-up sheet gets put out into the community room at 12:30 PM each day of distribution, all hell breaks loose. I am not kidding. These people have pushed, shoved, stepped on (or over) other individuals in order to secure their place on that list as close to #1 as possible, even if that means someone with less mobility and speed gets shoved aside. I have personally witnessed a man getting up from his chair across the room, stepping over chairs and tables to get to the list. Brushing aside people in his path.

Again, let me remind you that this is donated food items from the community. This is nothing like steak, shrimp, glorious food items of luxury. We’re talking bread, canned goods, meat products at times, soups, pasta, and various other food suppliments. There is a nice display of desserts commonly on the table for their selection though. Mainly old doughnuts and other pastries.

They have overcome their own senses and thrown away all shame in order to be able to put their names on that list at the very top so that they are able to receive first choice at what is being offered to them.

I had been the one responsible to put that sign-up sheet on the table for a short time. Whenever I would do that, I would find myself literally surrounded by at least eight people at a time, on all sides of me to the point where I couldn’t even move my wheelchair to get out of the way. I would have to basically cry for help in order for someone to get out of the way so that I could move.

Suggesting that everyone step into an orderly fashion and form a line falls upon deaf ears (whether they are actually hearing impaired or not.) This system also has failed because one person would write the names of several people down before anyone else has a chance to grab a pen. So the first person in line would obviously be #1, but they are also writing down the names of their close friends and neighbors on lines #2-6. Thus, making the person who is actually second in line to be #7.

For sure, this has others in an outcry and they are suddenly calling for a lynching of those guilty. But don’t feel sorry for those who are being left out. Some of them had a strategy of getting into the community room as soon as it opened its doors in the morning and actually sat down and waited for that list to be brought out. So then comes the cries of “I was here first. I was here before this person so I should be before them!”. 

Umm no. That’s not how it works. Whenever your name is  written down on that list, that is your placement and that’s when you will be called. And another thing… if your name is called by me, and you are not in the room or can be found immediately? Your name goes to the bottom of the list. This is has been the structure of the rules and will remain as such.

Not fair? Well, “you gotta be present to win” so to speak.

This system was replaced four months ago. The new system was that each person would write down their apartment number (not their name) on a slip of paper and put it into the basket. Their number is drawn and whenever they are drawn, that is who is first in line, and the next and the next and so on.

It was tricky the first month as people were walking into the community room expecting one procedure and ended up with another. We all had to get used to it. By the second month, it began to show signs of weakness. The same group of people who were just so desperate to be the top of the list, were harassing me to draw their names first as I was the one who had volunteered to help out in the first place. I’ve stood my ground and given no favoritism. Clearly those who are greedy have not been too pleased with it or me. I just ignore them whenever they try to sweet talk me into drawing their number first.

Today though, was a very bold act of avarice and self-importance as I was drawing people’s names as they came out. Those who commonly harass me to draw their numbers first were right on cue. I had called a number out and had handed the slip of paper in so that there would be an accurate  count of who was there and who was not. Suddenly, behind me was someone totally different. Someone who had been bugging me since we had started at 1:04 PM. The four extra minutes was in fact, intentional.

The selfish party had claimed that the person’s name who had been called had given them permission to switch places but clearly they had not.

It was cruel act of selfishness as I understood that while I was handing in the slip of paper, the trading request took place. Yet the person who I had just called didn’t stand a chance in public in front of that many other residents to deny that request. Later I would find out that absolutely NO permission was given at all.

I do not understand the whole entire process of this. As hungry as we might be at this point in the month and eager to receive food items, to go through this is NOT a life or death struggle. Nobody here, including the complex staff will ever allow one of its residents to go hungry. Especially since so much food is being donated and brought in. Even if its something as simple as a few cans of green beans. They will not starve.

All I can honestly say about it all is DON’T MESS WITH THE ELDERLY! You may think they are quiet and frail and kind and sweet and loving. Some of them are. But to underestimate them is definitely foolish.