The Best Day To Break Up Is Valentine’s Day?

Well, I have heard it all now.  

The perfect day for a colleague to break up with his serious girlfriend of eight and a half years, will be Valentine’s Day 2014.

He has spent over $129.99 in an arrangement of black long stemmed roses to be delivered either to her place of work or to her home.

Yep. Over $13 a piece!!!

Because he wants to break up with her.

The story seems to be cold-hearted and unfair and totally uncool.

Until you hear the reasons as to WHY he wants to break up with her.

He’s very well off, financially. He has everything he wants and more. But he got caught up with this woman so long ago, and has been losing his money like a broken pipeline from BP. Take that and you add the fact that her infidelities are insurmountable. She even attempted to crawl into my own pants once before. But Dambreaker Don’t Play Dat!!!

It sounds as if she’s been doing this since the beginning. But now he’s reached his limit. And this money that he is spending on delivering the black roses is nothing to him. As long as she takes the hint and leaves him alone for good.

I attempted to personally stop him from doing this. But he would not listen. I told him to break up with her personally. I even made the suggestion he use that money a lot better than black roses. But none of it went into his head.

So ladies out there, who are preparing to celebrate Single Awareness Day …. count your lucky stars that you are not this woman.

 

The Rose Thief

“I’d rather have roses on my table than diamonds on my neck.”~ Emma Goldman

I do not know who these people think they are and I do not know where they come from, but the last that I knew is if you walk onto another person’s property and take something from their garden without prior permission, that’s stealing.

Yesterday I saw exactly that and I had caught them in the act. This was not the first time either that I had caught this person messing around in the rose bushes and clipping off roses.

I do not know who planted them. They were here when I moved in. And I personally never mess with it even though I am aware that you have to deal with them once in a while to make sure that they bring back more beautiful blooms.

But I like them. If I didn’t, I’d have them removed. What I do not like is the fact that anyone walking around outside on the property thinks that they can just come up and take a rose or two without asking.

After a brief meeting with my apartment manager, he said that there was nothing that he could do or say other than “Don’t do that” to enforce people to stop stealing the roses. I then gave the retort that if he was not going to do anything about it, then I would. He nodded and I took that as the blessing to do whatever it takes.

I forgot to mention to him that he might wanna have some bail money set aside just in case I find the same people are doing it over and over and over again.

Yesterday morning, I had three small buds that were beginning to bloom. By the afternoon I had only two. And when I caught the person doing it, they were trimming back some of the stems on the rose bushes. But I gave no permission for them to do that, nor did I ask them to help prune the bushes. I don’t care if they think or believe that they are only doing something to help, stealing is wrong. And wrong is wrong. I also do not care if they think that they are entitled or deserving of a rose or two because they think that they are helping. If you do not ask, then you are in the wrong.

And its not like I would deny anyone IF THEY WOULD ASK FIRST.

But I only had three starting to bloom. And after the fact, I found three more buds that haven’t started to open yet. I would have had six. After that, I wouldn’t have cared if they asked for one. But now I have two and I don’t know if/when the other three will begin to open up.

I’m also sick of finding that those who are doing this aren’t even people who live here! They are people who are hired by home health agencies to help those who do live here. What the hell are they doing spending their time in my corner of the world? That’s not what they are here for!!

So I’m off for now to buy a slingshot and fill a squirt bottle full of water.

 

 

You’re A Douchebag!

“If it was legal to shoot all of the stupid people in the world, we would run out of bullets.”~ Dambreaker

This morning, I strolled on over to the corner store. I went up the hill and some random guy shouted at me asking if I wanted any help getting to the top of the hill.

Before I could politely decline, this very muscle-bound man came up behind me and shoved me over the top of the hill and then he kept going even when I was on level ground again.

It was like being blasted like a rocket into outer space.

Sometimes I allow people to help, sometimes I do not.

So then he wanted to know what the reasons were that I was in a wheelchair. And I told him.

His response was the worst thing that I have ever heard in my entire life!!!!

He told me that he couldn’t understand how I could live my life this way, being stuck in a wheelchair all day and night for the rest of my life.

Honestly, when I explain my disability, I do not normally expect people to have that light turn on and they fully understand what all I have to go through every day of my life. What he said next, ruined my entire day.

He honestly looked me in the face and said that he could never life the rest of his life in a wheelchair, and that he would just kill himself before he was confined to a wheelchair like that.

I was filled with shock, rage, and disbelief.

I asked him if he felt that was his solution. If people that live in wheelchairs should just kill themselves.

And then the rage and disbelief continued to grow.

He said with a straight face that he just couldn’t understand why more people don’t do it.

I told him a story about a man who was born in Austria who would eventually become the leader of a country called Germany in the 1930’s. That man also had the same solution. He called it the Final Solution.

Yes, I compared him to Adolf Hitler. Although Hitler’s rage was more focused on the Jewish and other classes of society. But he did exterminate and kill anyone who were in wheelchairs and were physically disabled as well.

Before he had time to react, I told him that he simply needed to go away and leave me alone.

I did have my 23” broken hockey stick with me. And yes, I could have chosen to smack him with it. But because of his muscle bound body, I felt that I would have lost that battle.

Now I have really heard some stupid things from people who do not understand the life that I have to live. And I’ve probably heard every little joke, insult, or remark in the book. And I’ve learned to just roll my eyes. But this one? It hurt. And it hurt a lot.

I came home. Began to cry, and ended up falling asleep for about an hour. I woke up, still angry at the guy. And I really do not wish to ever see him again.

It is like this guy’s brain wasn’t attached to his spinal cord. There’s a reason why there is a brain inside of his skull and its not to fill up the space inside. And why he chose not to use it before he opened his mouth is beyond me. 

Why should I kill myself? Why should anyone with a disability kill themselves?

And what of our nation’s veterans. Ironically those people who have fought and sacrificed their limbs so this guy can keep his freedoms to say stupid things like that?

Should they kill themselves as well because they are now in wheelchairs for defending our country?

The bottom line answer is not just no but HELL NO!

I’ve talked about thinking before you speak, and this is an excellent example of that NOT happening at all!

I have tough skin, but this time it broke through. And I really shouldn’t have to put up with that kind of immaturity and stupidity.

There’s nothing wrong with me that I should have to die. Just because I do not walk and often appear that I may be having trouble getting up hills. Good grief!!!

So this guy is a complete and total douchebag. And who knows what his deal is? Having to say something like probably just to make himself feel better?? Nobody will ever know.

But I am NOT going to throw in the towel like that. You can just screw off if you think like that. We have enough difficulty as it is, we don’t need your psychological stupidity on top of it.

 

Misheard Lyrics

“I’m the most misunderstood, misquoted person I know, honestly.”~ Dusty Springfield

Wow!!

So there I was, killing time today on YouTube watching a variety of videos that have been uploaded because they were “recommended” to me. Why? I don’t know.

But I sat there watching (rather listening) to music that was just put together with written lyrics as text. Then I noticed something.

“Goodbye’s The Saddest Word” was one of the videos that I watched ‘with lyrics’. The other one, “I Surrender”. BOTH of them were just the original music with lyrics as text. BOTH of them full of errors. Not just one, but A LOT!!

I tell you, YouTube sure does allow a bunch of idiots on their website. At first I rolled my eyes at the first couple of errors. But when it went on into the second song, oy vey!!!

It was astonishing to me that these people didn’t check these lyrics for corrections. I would think that it would be something that you would double check with the album because of course, the lyrics should be printed. Record companies would be damned if they actually had a misprint of their own because millions of copies of that particular album may be sold, and if they all had misprints, then its primetime for humiliation and someone’s gonna get fired.

It is frustrating and yet, hilarious!

You have to admit, and I know that I do as well, that we all have been victim of singing the WRONG lyrics to songs in our lifetime. It’s just something that happens. Usually when we sing in public and we sing it wrong, there’s always someone there to “correct us”. Then argument commences, until someone actually is there with some kind of physical evidence that yep- we were wrong all along. Followed by the inevitable humiliation and laughter at ourselves and a lesson learned.

There is a website called “kissthisguy.com” (I think that is right) and it lists an entire collection of songs throughout history of lyrics that have been sung dreadfully wrong by the public. Some of them are funny. Some of them make you wanna slam your face into the nearest wall.

And next time you decide to sing along with your favorite tune, have the album cover jacket with you, it will have the CORRECT lyrics, and you won’t have to worry about such humiliation.

Especially for karaoke singers.