CAT FIGHT!!!!

“No matter how much cats fight, there always seem to be plenty of kittens.”~ Abraham Lincoln

 

So I’ve held on to this story for a while now, a couple of weeks. I’m not too entirely sure why as I know that some might find the tale rather interesting.

 

Other times when I have thought about writing it, I was always interrupted. So I locked the door, unplugged the telephone, and have tossed the cell phone into the toilet.

 

Never in my lifetime to this point did I think that I would actually be an eyewitness to an actual “cat fight”. But it did happen, and within the walls of my own home.

 

I had a nurse coming by to check on me that day. That still is full swing, although sadly the physical therapy is not.

 

But I had also set up services with a second home agency. And that second agency was to be responsible for hiring an attendant to help me with those personal needs that I am unable to take care of myself in my home. And not so much the medical side of things which require attention.

 

Because of the fact that the second agency had nobody to hire right away, they were insisting on sending people to my home to help get a start on things. And boy, did I need that!!

 

My only problem was that one day…. I was not told that anyone was coming. With the nurse already in place, it set the stage for the entertainment purposes of this blog post.

 

The nurse from the first agency has actually stood in my home and called the other agency to find out what was going on, building on the desperate “need” that I had to get someone to even come out. Weeks prior she had begun to get frustrated with this second agency that nobody was coming out to help at all.

 

The surprise visit of this “specialist” coming to help clean and do laundry and what not during the same time of this “go-get-em” nurse was rather explosive.

 

The nurse began to jump down the throat of this particular volunteer. She said that she had been here about a week before, but they had sent so many people in and out that I couldn’t remember them all.

 

The nurse got on to her and started talking about how poor this second agency has become. She focused on the fact that the agency and its workers failed at communicating with themselves and their clients. She went deeper to even explain it that nobody within the agency knows how to pick up a telephone to tell the clients which day they will and will not be there. On and on and on.

 

The woman just sat there stunned. Each and every time the nurse would speak she would point the finger directly at this woman. But when the woman would respond, she would look at me and not the accusing nurse.

 

I would have to say that I fully agreed with what the nurse was saying. I was surprised that the nurse didn’t start yelling and screaming and carrying on. The accused sat there frozen on my couch.

 

Then one word was uttered by the woman who sat so still: “Bitch.”

 

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnd in this corner…. DING! DING! DING! DING!!

 

They both moved at each other at the same time, grabbing and swinging and everything a person could imagine. I had two professionals from two separate agencies at each other’s throat. ALL professionalisms were out the window.

 

It went on for several minutes before I actually had to somehow get in between them and break it up. Dangerous. I’m not sure how I am surviving today to be honest.

 

Men: NEVER attempt to break up a cat fight. You’ll get sucked into the whirlwind of it all.

 

The only reason why this was broken up so “easily” was at this altitude in a wheelchair, when I reached up to grab an arm and pull it away… I had misfired and instead grabbed a breast. Although by now I don’t remember which one. And I don’t want to, to be honest.

 

Once I got them separated, I told the “specialist” that I honestly had NOTHING for her to do that day and the nurse was SUPPOSED to be there so with those weighing factors, including the fact that she had started the confrontation, she had to leave.

 

The nurse gathered her things and prepared to do what she had to do and I walked the other one to the front door. I made sure to lock it behind her so there was no threat of her coming back for more. But I never did think to walk the nurse to her car, “just in case”.  Oh well. Lesson learned right there.

 

So there was no baby oil, chocolate pudding, or even mud. But the cat fight happened anyway. I knew that there would be someone who would just happen to walk by and then they would call the police and then EVERYONE would be in trouble and I did what I could to prevent it.

 

Never seen a cat fight until then. Hopefully I never will again. Unless I’m kidnapped by my friends and they make me pay a $20 cover charge to get into somewhere. And then… just maybe then…. there will be baby oil, chocolate pudding, or mud.

 

 

Disasters Of Distraction

 

“Girls were always my biggest distraction in school.”~  Channing Tatum

 

Happy Friday, everybody! Or around here: “Coffee & Donuts Day”.

 

Each and every Friday morning, I am filled with curiosity to see just what kind of behavior will be exhibited by those wanting donuts. It always varies depending on who is there. But this morning was a bit different. But I figured that it would be particularly interesting considering how greedy these neighbors showed off during Food Pantry Day just a couple days ago.

 

The van in which contained those neighbors who went walking for excercise (as well as carried the donuts) broke down. It caused a great delay for a lot of people. But surprisingly enough, everyone was calm. Nobody was throwing a tantrum about the tardiness of the weekly donut distribution.

 

But coffee was readily available. To which I had consumed numerous cups. However, what goes in must come out. Particularly of the liquid variety.

 

“Holding it” was not an option.

 

I returned to evacuate my bladder in the privacy of my own home. I began to believe that as soon a I left the building, the donuts would arrive. And with the group of people who had been already waiting there, nobody could say for sure if there would be anything left.

 

But I did what I had to do and then went on my journey back to the community room to seek the answer to the burning question.

 

My home is at the top of a hill. To get to the community room, I must negotiate a slight turn in the middle of four sidewalks that cross one another and still manage the incline and watch my speed so I don’t run over anyone.

 

As I was beginning to build up speed, I was distracted by something out of the corner of my eye. A woman was walking on the property that I had never seen before. Wouldn’t you know it, I looked up and over the back of my shoulder as I had to maintain speed and get around that slight turn.

 

My distraction would get the best of me as I did not slow down enough to take the slight turn and stay on the sidewalk. Because I simply wasn’t paying any attention to where I was.

 

The woman that I had been staring at disappeared in a flash as I felt the wheelchair began to lean heavily to one side. I looked forward and I could feel myself going at an angle to my left.

 

I knew what was going to happen and there was not a lot that I could do. I tipped over and got dumped out of my wheelchair to the left side. My body tumbling like a circus performer before I stuck the landing on my butt in the grass. The wheelchair now empty…. simply tossed to the side.

 

I’m physically fine. I don’t even have any scrapes or cuts or anything. Nothing broken, nothing bruised. Well, maybe my own personal ego…. but only a little bit.

 

That’s what I get for not paying attention to what I was doing. Rather than doing something that I do dozens of times a day for the past several years, but instead I focused on something (or someone) else which caused the “crash and burn”.

 

When these kinds of things happen, I find myself to hit the dirt and the first thing that I always do is look around to see if anyone might have seen it. Nine times out of ten there isn’t anyone around. So the humiliation factor goes to nothing.

 

I lifted up my wheelchair and then climbed back into it. I soared down the rest of the hill and turned into the community room where there was only four donuts left. I was shocked that they were not all gone.

 

I had eaten my donut and came back home so I can get ready for the day. But still had to blog about it while it was still fresh in my mind. Someone is going to need a laugh today, and find this funny.

 

 

 

 

The Reign of Rude

“Because I remember, I despair. Because I remember, I have the duty to reject despair.”~Elie Wiesel

 

Ladies and gentlemen! Subscribers, followers, and readers…. here we go again!!

 

What day is it? Yep! Food Pantry Day.

 

Most of our usual suspects were there. One of the worst offenders was ironically not there. But the rest of them were.

 

One had even turned so greedy that when she helped out earlier in the morning to put everything in place after bringing it home, she came back in the afternoon and dared to try to go for a second round.

 

I’m telling you, these residents have got some SERIOUS issues!!

 

But today, we had a new player in the drama that is the avarice of Food Pantry Day. One who has been unfortunately burning her own bridges with her neighbors and other residents. I had forgotten just how much of a problem a person could have with her.

 

It is up to the social worker and her decisions on whether or not someone can go ahead and get their turn in early. Commonly, she’s been allowing those who carry heavy boxes of food in to take their turn first before the rest of the crowd. And it is just her way of saying “thank you” for all of their help and assistance.

 

I was surprised when I “showed up for duty” this afternoon that one of the offenders had helped and therefore our poor social worker was puzzled as to why she was back.

 

Playing dumb like you don’t understand English……. for the win!!!!

 

But this new player into today’s BS drama…. let’s just say that a lot of people believe that we can do without. And that’s a real sad thing to say or even believe.

 

Every time I called someone ELSE to go into the Food Pantry, there was always commentary. There was always some kind of remark about how SHE NEEDED to be next in line. And every time she was not… I got to hear about it.

 

The premise is nothing new, just the characters.

 

And then I started to get it from another resident, but I did not find their remarks as abrasive. So I felt comfortable teasing back that I had control over everything and if they kept it up, I’d never call their name.

 

So then our offender from hell just turned up the heat.

 

I finally just looked to see if I could find her name in the lottery box. And I could not. I was absolutely stunned that it was not in the box, and she’s got the nerve to crawl up and down my back??

 

Whiskey. Tango. Foxtrot. Over!!

 

I told the social worker the situation about how that resident’s name was not there in the box. I wondered if I should have just left her to suffer the consequences of her actions, or bring it to her attention and go from there.

 

So I pulled out all of the pieces of paper and spread them out on the table before me. Then I still could not find her name. At that point, I called her over to me.

 

I asked her, “Do you see your name anywhere?”. Then without hesitation, the woman became infuriated by the fact that the piece of paper that her had name on it was next to the box haphazardly, and was nowhere near being inside the box.

 

I simply didn’t see it there. Countless minutes of useless agitation and there she is accusing me of pulling her name out of the box so that I did not have to call her name to go into the Food Pantry. And I had done all of this on purpose to hurt her.

 

Ohhhhhhhhhhh the sore humanity of it all!!

 

So then I hear her scream, “That’s just wrong! I’M NEXT!!”.

 

Umm, no you are NOT!! I put her name back in the box and shook the demons out of it and pulled a name, that was yet again still not hers.

 

Then she asked if she was next. And I told her with a straight face that she was not. And that caused more “Oh Woe Is Me” crap. So I was so happy that she was actually (and legitimately) the next person after that to go in. Only to get rid of her.

 

I don’t play favorites and I never will. It is a different circumstance if the social worker makes a plea to send someone in ahead of the crowd, due to whatever reason. I just go by what she says.

 

Meanwhile, out in the hallway was roaming Miss “I Don’t Speak English”.. getting more and more concerned as I never called her name. I didn’t have to. She had her turn this morning when she helped out.

 

And then I would eventually “leave my post” and have the box unattended. And she went through it to see that there were no more papers in it. By that time there were only three people left and I pulled them out in no particular order and knew who was first, second, and third.

 

After that (in broken English… more like shattered), she asked me why her name was not in the box. I did my best to speak in smaller words saying that she had her turn in the morning.

 

She ignored me.

 

She then would see a resident hanging around the door of the Food Pantry and when that woman immediately strolled in, our little greedy one decided to park it there. She’s not stupid by any stretch of the imagination.

 

The real person that would be next would be invaded upon and then it was time to RING THE BELL!!!

 

Our greedy one rolled inside and words were spoken by the one whom she had transgressed against.

 

Then in an effort of wanting peace, she retreated her anger and the two left standing in line just moved out of the way and allowed her inside. She would end up coming out with just a few cans of food and maybe a couple bags of beans. Nothing major. Its not like she broke the bank or anything. Everyone gets the same thing. Unless you recall the strawberry flavored milk debacle in a previous blog post.

 

After the last two went in, I came straight home.

 

Luckily I didn’t snap. But I am sure exhausted.

 

I’m irritated by the fact that people have the guts to accuse me of doing things that I never did. I can see how maybe she might have felt that way. However, I never got the benefit of the doubt. What she saw (or thought what had happened) was automatically LAW??

 

Screw that.

 

It’s over for today, and this month. And people snicker when I call it “my time of the month”. I wonder if they actually get it or not. Because one thing is for sure, the residents here sure don’t.

 

I just wanted to come home and scream. People are most likely lucky I didn’t do that either. I’m sure the police would have been alerted.

 

UGH!!

 

 

 

 

 

Mall Mystery Woman

“Any genuine philosophy leads to action and from action back again to wonder, to the enduring fact of mystery.”~ Henry Miller

Last November, I would fall upon a mystery that still has not been solved. This blog post is the very long and detailed story and the follow-up.

From the time that the sledge hockey team was on the road for the very first time in the program’s history, having that opportunity to go somewhere else and play, we found ourselves in Houston. We played for many hours in just over 27 hours and did all of that and came home.

Being that the second day of playing would lead us to our first visit to Ice Skate USA, inside of a shopping mall.

We had time between games and so the team stayed in the mall and took the time to look around, walk through places, and get something to eat at the food court.

Then it began. The true mystery that has been keeping me in the dark for months now.

A woman caught my eye. She looked at me and smiled so sweetly and waved doing that finger rolling kind of wave. Then as she passed by, she mouthed the words “hi there!” and continued on. It hit me like a ton of brick dust.

Her bright smile, her long wavy red hair, and her constant desire to wave wiggling her finger tips whenever she saw me inside the mall completely had my senses going at the speed of light.

She was working there as a train conductor. A fun ride for the children up to a certain height and/or their parents. And a quick lap or two and back again. And that is why I saw her in all kinds of different places throughout this shopping mall. Each time and without fail, if she saw me… she smiled really big and waved in the same fashion. And it was several times, not just two or three.

Could be that she suddenly was interested? What is going on with that wave? Does she always wave like that to people?  Or was it a case of her just being friendly, polite, and warm?? What the heck was going on???

I sat there with my thoughts, knowing I still had about a half an hour to kill in the mall before leaving to go to my next hockey match. And then I said to myself, “Screw this! I’m going to go talk to her!!”.

I knew that my history of speaking to women was less than admirable and would never be considered to go down into the history books . That and being full of shyness. But in this case I felt that I had absolutely nothing to lose by going over and saying “hello”.

I figured that if it turned out to be a disaster that because of the fact that I was from out of town, that I most likely would never see her again. But I never considered what would happen if I did speak to her and things went over well. I mean after all, every time I saw her, she waved and smiled really big.

I went over to the side of the shopping mall where this train that she was driving would start and stop. A nice mural painted on the wall to give a feeling of a train depot from long ago, complete with boardwalk.

But the train was not there. She was on the move somewhere. But the mall was so big, and I was honestly tired from the hockey, so I didn’t go after her or try to hunt her down.

It would seem like an eternity as I played “Beat the clock before I have to leave”. And after what was even longer of an eternity, finally I heard the dinging of the bell and cry of the whistle and I was right in her path!!

So in order to avoid being ran over by something that was probably going less than 2 MPH, I backed off. But I was actually close enough to her that I could have extended my arm and touched her.

As she rolled by, she saw me again. I caught her in the middle of eating a snack, and she still waved at me in the same manner, even though her snack food was between her fingers and she smiled. Giggling to herself that I caught her with food in her mouth as she grinned as best possible.

I patiently waited for her to stop the train and begin the process of letting parents and children off the ride. And then I was going to make my move and at very least…  say hello.

It would not happen.

The ultimate definition of the “cock block” came into play when a teammate of mine poked me in the arm and started asking questions about what I was doing and when I was leaving the mall to go play our next match and with whom I was going with.

Mindless chatter and absolutely nothing too important for him to be asking about. Just general FYI stuff. But each and every second was counting and unfortunately ticking away.

I had to be a little rude to him by saying that I was about to “go talk to a girl” and I wanted to do it before we had to leave. Eventually he got the point and left me alone. But like I said, this would not happen for me.

When this woman left with another round of parents and children, I waved and she smiled and waved back. But I could no longer afford to wait for her to return.

Waving like an idiot and over-emphasizing it was all I could do. And even though the train was moving as slow as mud, there were too many people in the mall walking around that I couldn’t just roll up along side her and have a conversation as she moved around the building and doing all of it before I had to leave.

I was out of time.

So then, it was time for Operation: Hope That We Get Invited Back Again To Play Sledge Hockey At The Same Rink In The Future So I Could See Her Again.

It would happen, in March of this year. Well, the invitation to play again.

A few players from my team went to Houston to scrimmage, and formulate plans for our upcoming tournament. After it was all said and done, I bolted like lightning over to the “train depot”, only to find nobody working there.

A few minutes later, the train was in action, but it was not the same wavy redhead with the gorgeous smile. She wasn’t there. And our team returned home just as quickly as we had arrived. All in one day.

It would be six full months before I would return to Houston AND see her again, all in the same trip. And that was during the Paralympic Sport Experience that I wrote about in my previous blog.

Same ice rink, same mall…. an opportunity had come. But I didn’t have a lot of time for chit-chat. Again, tired from the hockey, hungry, thirsty, and everything else in between.

But I did it. I went over there and I just started to watch for the perfect moment to say something to her while she loaded and unloaded her passengers. I would soon learn that she had her job down to a near science.

Stop. Unload. Receive money for tickets. Load passengers. Hand out tickets. Go.

The best I did at that point was take a few pictures of her. Unfortunately I understand that from a person’s viewpoint, it does look a bit creepy because in one photograph her back was turned. To be brutally honest, she was looking in my direction and turned around at the last second before the camera took the photograph. My fingers can be so slow when it comes to photography. Or at least my reaction time stinks!!

But the flash went off and she definitely noticed it. She saw me there, camera in my hand and just giggled and smiled and waved yet again.

I wondered why in the world I was sitting there, so I approached her. Her routine was very quick as she moved people on and off. I didn’t think that I was going to get a lot of conversation in. Even though I was aware that yes… this IS her job!! And her loitering could get her fired. I didn’t want to do that.

I really did surprise myself that she was actually beginning to multi-task with me while working. From moment to moment, I would back off so she could deal with her customers. Then I would start talking again.

The end result was that I asked her if I could get another photograph of her, basically asking her permission. She agreed.

Then she went over to one of the children in the lead car and was playful with him. It was a pretty safe bet that this child might have been hers. But I noticed an older gentleman sitting next to him, and then another child.

I asked if that was her family and she said, “That is my son.” Then we took a picture together, capturing that glorious smile of hers.

I could feel the bullets flying overhead, narrowly missing my face as she never mentioned “that’s my husband/boyfriend/whatever”. I believe that if she would have admitted to being married or taken or whatever else have you, that I would have felt all of it to be in vain without thinking clearly at the possibility of the genesis of a new friendship. Even if I was still living far, far away.

I explained that I was in town for the hockey and I would be in and out of Houston for a while. (Both for sledge hockey and for SIX MINUTE CENTURY). And I mentioned that I just might be living there one day.

Then… and I don’t know why… and ONLY then did I introduce myself by first name only. She reciprocated with the same politeness and personal information. I shook her hand and gave her my card.

The nerves finally came to the surface as I began to shudder and fumble my own speech as I encouraged her to either send me an e-mail or find me on Facebook. Her reply was “Okay sure.” Then I watched as she stuffed my personal card down the front of her conductor’s overalls.

I repeated her name to make sure I heard her right and again she reciprocated the action. I’ve read online articles about what that means when women do that…. could it be true???

I bid her farewell. And she said, “Nice to meet you. Welcome to Houston”.

Then I left, sharing the tale of what just transpired to anyone that would frickin’ listen. Later on, I would end up going into the food court and joining my team for a little hanging out time and rest before we went to check into our hotel. 

I kept looking at my camera numerous times at the few photographs that I had taken and suddenly very eager to get back home. Plus I wouldn’t stop talking about the “success” I had and I could not believe how “easy” it was to have done what I did do.

When we finally left the mall for good, we passed by and I went over towards the “depot” but kept my distance again. Our eyes locked and I waved and she waved back. Then I just turned around and left, not knowing if her eyes were burning through the back of my head as I rolled away.

I think my teammates wanted to throw me out into the streets and have me wheel home because I wouldn’t shut up about it.

But the following morning meant more hockey, and I would have to wait before I came home to even see if she had e-mailed, called, or found me on Facebook.

So far to the point of the writing of this post… she has not.

I do realize that my 500 business cards that I ordered was meant expressly for the promotion of sledge hockey and possibly earn donations or even attract some people to join our team and enjoy the sport as much as the rest of the team enjoys it. But many times, I have also given those cards out to women that I found interesting.

Sad to say that the history of my card distribution has had zero results. So in a way, I could say that the odds are against me for this woman to contact me. Of course I met her at her job, and she does have a small child so life could be pretty busy for her. I can only keep optimistic and cross my fingers that she does contact me in some manner.

I can’t say for sure, nor would I want to say what will happen. Positivity is key. One simply never really knows.

The first layer of the onion mystery is gone now though. I know what her first name is, and I know that she has a son. Nothing more… the mystery continues and I intend to pursue until it is done.

 

 

Paralympic Sport Experience- Houston Edition

“A good hockey player plays where the puck is. A great hockey player plays where the puck is going to be.”~Wayne Gretzky

And now we’ve reached the end of the line for the 2011-12 sledge hockey season. What better way to go out with a HUGE BANG than to travel to Houston to participate in their Paralympic Sport Experience.

Our team hosted the same kind of event back in January, now it was time to go to Houston to participate in theirs.

Houston has been totally awesome to us. We bonded very closely with one another over the course of a single weekend back in April when we marched on to Dallas for the tournament.

What was even more special about this event was the promotions for it all. The sledge hockey program did an incredible job sending out to the general public that it was going to happen, and even had special guests arrive just for the event.

People like Houston Oilers QB Dan Pastorini was on hand. A few of the cheerleades from the Houston Aerodynamice Dance team was there, and the Houston Aeros mascot. (All of which, I never saw a single second of with my own eyes. I was out on the ice when they all arrived. And I am still very adamant about getting a photograph with the one cheerleader. I attempted it when we were there last November at a Houston Aeros game, but the picture didn’t come out. So I’m on the hunt to fix the problem! Just saying.)

Even the mayor of Houston proclaimed that day to be “Paralympic Sport Day”. You know it’s really awesome when the mayor gets involved.

But what I thought was really cool was the presence of Andy Yohe, gold medalist from the 2010 Vancouver Paralympics and captain of Team USA. He was totally awe-inspiring to everyone who got to be on the same ice with him. Plus he was gracious to give out helpful hints on the game and very supportive of everyone who was there and encouraging everyone to keep on practicing and never surrender. I love it when people do that sort of thing.

What I thought was really cool was that the ice rink we were on, was in the middle of a shopping mall. And it being Mother’s Day weekend… it was packed!!

There were people surrounding the glass and just watching us play our hearts out.

I was thrilled that members of the band SILENCED WITHIN came to see me and watched me play for a while. I was totally appreciative that they were able to come out and watch, even on a busy and stressful weekend as Mother’s Day weekend always seems to be.

Things were so very awesome, until I got “pinballed” around on the ice and I didn’t realize how close I was to the wall and I hit it, head first rather than putting up my shoulders to receive the impact.

Of course, I get teased about leaving the ice so early and I didn’t let it bother me that much. But when I’ve hit my head and then I start to see different levels of reality and the dreadful urge to vomit, I think that was the perfect time to throw in the towel for the night.

The following morning, we went back at it for another two hours at a different ice rink.

Again, very successful I thought. And I even learned something from it all. I was able to improve on my shot. And of course, that’s always a GOOD thing!

I have to give special thanks to the Houston program. They were responsible for allowing my team the opportunity to come down, spend the night, and then play again in the morning. They were gracious enough to take care of the overnight accomodations.

And even though the entire time I was gone away was only about 30 hours, as we arrived home it felt like we had been gone for days. Probably from all the fun we had.

I’m given to understand that perhaps the Houston program wants to continue throughout the summer. And I think that would be great, considering that the more we practice, the better we will become. Especially if they are thinking about going to next year’s tournament which is going to be held in Philadelphia.

They want us to consider coming down and just spend some time that first day hanging out and socializing, and then when ice time is available, we would get on the ice and do it all over again. They were thinking probably once a month. But once a month is better than none at all.

Thanks to everyone who has been supportive. For me personally, my team, and for the STARSkaters program. All those who have generously given their time, effort, and financial support. And even for those who just say “YAAAY!!”. It is quite helpful, believe it or not.

 

 

 

The Best 216 Minutes Ever

“Humor can alter any situation and help us cope at the very instant we are laughing.”~Allen Klein

Two telephone calls. Two people. 216 minutes well spent.

Yes, I was on the telephone for that period of time combined with the two calls that were made.

And in that time frame caused a series of human reaction and emotions that were off the charts!

I laughed so hard that I couldn’t breathe, and then I laughed so hard that I cried. I laughed so hard that I snorted and drooled… SEVERAL times. And I think maybe I farted once or twice when doubled over, but I hope the people I spoke to didn’t hear it.

There’s only a few select people that can make me laugh so hard that I come completely unglued to the point where I just fall out of my wheelchair and hit the floor, and then I start to laugh about that. These were two of them.

I don’t remember exactly where, but I had heard a long time ago that laughter actually does help in lowering the possibility of having coronary problems such as a heart attack and stroke. If this is true, I won’t have my first heart attack until I am 628 years old.. I laughed THAT much!!!

I’m feeling blessed to have these kinds of people in my life, rather than sitting here with my head in my hands, fuming about those who cause me pain and mental strife. But then again when I look back, I’m very fortunate to have those people in my life that know how to make me laugh.

I am usually the one who MAKES people laugh. So to get me to laugh that hard and that much, either takes a talent that is much higher than mine or I must take stock and admit that I’ve found some absolute gems in life.

And besides, other than those who prescribe to “misery love company”… who wouldn’t want to be around those who make you happy???

Its always so easy to feel dumped on. But for whatever reason it is a challenge for many for them to find their rays of sunshine on a gloomy day when they’ve been sitting on a pot of gold all along.

So yeah, nearly three and a half hours on the telephone (for those of you who can’t count and haven’t figured it out yet) and I laughed so much in that time frame than I have in a lifetime.

I’ll prescribe to the funny bone on any given day of the week, and keep THAT company instead!!!!

 

 

 

 

The Relationship Jigsaw Puzzle

“Trust takes years to build and only a second to shatter.”~ Unknown. 

Reader’s Request Blog Post.

Awesome! I love it when I hear from people and they request for me to talk about a certain subject. I’m always open to those kinds of ideas.

Over the course of two and a half days, I listened to someone talk about realtionships and their life. All of them. From romantic to friendships, both past and present.

I gave him the analogy of the jigsaw puzzle. Sometimes we never know what is truly there behind someone until we began to put the pieces together.

Much like trust, relationships fall under the same guidelines as to what will make or break them.

Sometimes, relationships end when one thing tragically strikes. Which was the case for this person that I spoke to. He said that he was completely crushed when he found out that someone who he had considered as a friend, was probably not at friend at all. He was also crushed at the fact when he admitted to seeing the signs, but chose to either make excuses for them or chose to ignore them.

But I think that it is true. We never really know who people are, especially on the inside until we’ve taken the long road to get to know them. And in most cases, it does take years to understand who they are, what they are like, and whether or not they are someone that we would prefer to keep in our lives. Each day brings another piece to the puzzle. This person said that he thought he saw a beautiful picture forming in this jigsaw puzzle that was his friendship with this other person, but as days and weeks and even a few years went on… he realized that there was more to the picture of the jigsaw puzzle and it was NOT something that he liked. So now he’s feeling stuck because of the fact that he had invested so much of his life with them and now finds himself in a position where he doesn’t like where things are going.

I believe that in one way or another, we all go through the same thing in life. We begin a common bond with someone based on what we see at the surface. But as things progress and we get to know one another, we get to a point where we have to make a decision of whether or not we want to continue on with that relationship. Especially when things become very unstable or rocky. And they almost always will at some point.

The only thing that I could advise him on, was either stay with it or walk away and never look back. Relationships are never perfect. We have to understand that. There’s just going to be those times in which those people will do or say something that displeases us. Then the choice is either walk away from them, or forgive them and either way you go the point is to be able to carry on…. with or without them.

It wasn’t easy for him to hear me tell him this at all. He’s afraid that if he continues on with the relationship, that he’ll just find more and more negativity about them and it would make him miserable. But on the other hand, he feels that if he walks away that his time with them was worthless and wasted. On top of the feelings of guilt and being alone because he made the choice to walk away and that they are no longer a consistent fixture in his life.

Indifference and inaction isn’t the answer either. It just causes more heartache.

People come into our lives. Sometimes people leave our lives. But they ARE there for a reason. If they are not meant to be there for a lifetime, then they won’t be. And no matter how hard we fight to keep them there, it only causes things to get worse.

I feel really bad for him because I’ve been in his shoes so many stinkin’ times in my own life. Sometimes I think about how I miss those who are no longer in my life. But I have to also remember that there is a reason for that. And usually for me, that keeps my sanity at a certain balance to remember the reasons WHY they are no longer there.

The dismissal and disconnect of a relationship is never easy. But once we purge ourselves of the things that are “bad” for us, the sooner we can live a healthier life.

As social I am, I really know how much it stinks to either lose someone or let someone go. But there’s really nothing more that I can do in some situations. I can either hang on to the relationship that has soured, and stew in the painfulness and HOPE for the best, OR I can let go.. experience the pain at the beginning, and then heal and move on.

Each person is different. Sometimes it doesn’t take a lot of time for a person to realize what the jigsaw puzzle is turning out to be. And for others, it sometimes takes the entire jigsaw puzzle to be put together and stand back and see what they have before they realize what it is.

I couldn’t tell this guy “You need to leave, then it will be better”, and neither could I say, “Hang in there, it will get better” because I honestly don’t know for him what is right and what it is he is willing to put up with and just deal with certain situations. And I couldn’t say where he’s going to go. I just hope and wish for him the best.

But what I can say for those who read this, is that we must do what is BEST for us. We have to survive in life and do what we need to, in order to continue on in this lifetime. Yes, a lot of times we come across situations where its not easy to make a decision but ultimately there will come a time where we will need to make one before we can move on in our lives. Whether right or wrong.

We are strong though. We’ll make it through.