Summertime Delivery Blues

It’s very HOT in the state of Texas right now. Record temperatures are being broken almost daily. And there’s no relief in sight for well over the coming week.

For me to get anything, I have been staying inside and using online delivery services for what I need.

I created a small order for groceries. I found this second online delivery service that is far better than the first. Maybe one day I will write a post about it and show you the comparison. But that’s not important right now.

Living in a gated property, instructions were given on how to reach my front door along with the delivery and waited for the selected time in which it was to arrive.

Then the telephone rings. The driver is outside one of the many gates that stretch along the property and wants to be let in.

I verbally repeated the instructions to this woman. And the following responses from her were less than professional or nice.

Over and over again she kept telling me which numbered apartment she was parked in front of. But couldn’t find a key pad to enter a gate code to get on the inside.

A second and third time of repeating the instructions to her, she shouted back “Can’t you just let me inside?? I see a door. Just come open the door.”

I told her she was at the wrong gate and she needed to drive a little more to get to the correct gate. And more argument came from her as she screamed “Just come get me and open this door. I see a goddamned door.”

The first thing that came to mind was to tell her that I was not dressed to come outside.

She then began to cry and whimper about it. She said that if I was not going to come outside and open the door that she was looking at that she would not know how to get my delivery to me. She was obviously starting to give up and was probably getting ready to leave.

I told her that I was on the way.

I had a feeling inside of me that told me that if I actually went around to the other side of the building and opened the door that she kept talking about that she was going to find a person in a wheelchair attempting to make their way down the path and she was going to instantly regret it.

Needless to say, that I hung up on her as she was in the middle of another whining fit.

So out into the horrible heat I went. Today with another record breaking temperature today of 103°F/39°C.

As I rounded the building and she turned and saw me…. the look on her face was PRICELESS. Maybe even Internet worthy.

I did not think of it until now, but I should have went up to the door inside of the gate and told her that the door was locked and I didn’t have the key, or that the door was welded shut to keep people off the property who don’t belong here.

So I opened the door and she immediately went into this wave of apologies and excuses and then back to apologies. She claimed she saw no other gate. And I physically pointed it out to her. She still said she could not see it. So I gave very descriptive terms to her along the lengthy gate on where to find where she should have gone in the first place.

The bags were heavy and she did offer to carry them for me to my home. But I did not want her inside of my home.

I led her to the front door. And as we went along the path I explained to her how roads work and how much easier and more convenient it would have been for her if she would have just followed the instructions that I had provided for her already several times.

She walked in front of me and then I told her which apartment to walk towards. She got to the door and then she proceeded to open it. That is until I told her NOT to open the door and just leave the bags next to the door on the patio area.

Again she gave me another priceless look of disbelief. I really think she’s got a problem with following instructions. Perhaps she’s one of the many kinds of people that don’t like being told what to do. And I would think that if that was the case, she shouldn’t be working as a delivery driver.

I understand that it is hot outside. And I also could believe the possibility that she was running behind on her deliveries.

And I also understand that trying to find where I live can be very confusing. My family had plenty problems of their own when they first tried to visit me here. However the screaming, the whining, and the not following instructions is deplorable.

Just another day in the big hot sweltering city of Austin in the summertime, I guess.

Freakin’ idiot.

Your Laugh Of The Day

“I’ve put up with more humiliation than I care to remember.”~ B.B. King

I am going to tell you this story before I start digging a hole in the ground to hide in for the next week or so.

Life is filled with joy and it is filled with lots of humiliation.

This is a story of the latter.

This morning, I was hunting for some change. And finally I pinned down the apartment manager only to find out that he had no change. In total frustration, I started to spew. And the apartment manager started to spew back.

And then I heard and saw someone walk out the front door away from the office doors. I was curious because I thought I saw someone leaving that I had not seen in probably well over a year, possibly two by now.

I asked the apartment manager if I just saw who I thought I saw and his answer was “Probably.”

I tore out of his office like a lightning bolt, hoping that the person I was chasing was in no hurry to get into their vehicle and leave.

When I got outside, I saw her by the gates and I waited for a second before whistling at her.

And yeah I know, someone’s going to have a problem with that. But this is someone I’ve known for years and years and years and I know that once she saw that it was me that was whistling, she’d just giggle it off.

But whistled LOUD and PROUD. I was definitely making a bold statement to get her attention.

Then I waited for her to turn around and look in my direction.

IT WAS THE WRONG WOMAN!!!!!! 

Ohhh, what have I done? What have I done? The wave of shock and humiliation warmed over me like a cloud of death.

The strange woman looked in my direction and then proceeded on her way. She did nothing, she said nothing. And that was the end of it as I scrambled to turn around and go back inside of the office building.

She could have yelled and screamed and chewed me out. And I would have deserved every last bit of it, but she went away.

And now I sit here and think of all the different times I saw someone with long hair flowing down their back, only to find out that it was man. And that has happened more times than I want to admit.

Similar situation here.

I know that I am not the only one that has gone through this, but it is still humiliating nonetheless.

My Monday is starting out to be embarrassing. How’s your Monday????

Inch Of Dark Calls My Bluff

 

 

“More people will come if they think we’ll have punch and pie!” ~ South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut (1999)

I am going to share with you a tale of humor and humility.

I suppose that I would have to admit that with my love for live music, I’ve been kind of a super troll lately towards local bands whenever they are promoting/announcing an upcoming show.

They are only doing what they can in order to get people into the venues. It’s their job. I know that. But whenever I see something like that, I always ask if there will be “punch and pie”.

This past weekend I went out to see several bands play live. One of which was “Skunkfest 2018”. Ten glorious rocking bands at one venue. One of those bands is “Inch of Dark”.

In the days leading up to the event, the band would just promote, promote, promote all over social media. And I kept messing with them about having “punch and pie”.

Well, I think the promotions worked because there were so many people there. It was so hot outside in the Texas summer heat that I wanted to go back inside, but there were so many bodies inside that it drove me almost crazy.

I had received a message several hours from one of the band members of Inch of Dark, and they said that they had a surprise for me when I showed up. 

Inch of Dark wasn’t playing. They called me out to the max!

As I arrived at “Skunkfest 2018” I saw so many people that I knew that it was hard to say hello to all of them.

Then I saw members of Inch of Dark and they began to laugh and said “Wait here!”

They LITERALLY bought a pie and a bottle of Hawaiian Punch!! And they had saved me some. (I do wonder what happened to the rest of it.)

I was busted….

I was grateful for the surprise, even if it was a joke.

Inch of Dark is a bunch of great guys.  And I think even greater music. But I warn you, don’t mess with them because they will mess with you right back!!

I look forward to seeing them play live once more.

Check them out:

Inch Of Dark